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But they rarely talk about money because they feel that love takes precedence over money or in some cases, they don't want to 'offend' their partners. After getting married, couples realize love doesn't conquer money and no matter how strong love is among partners, they will always have power struggles, disagreements and fights over money issues.
As the saying goes, "Prevention is better than cure", talking about money no matter how sensitive it may seem at the time, is always better than misunderstandings and quarrels in a relationship. It doesn't matter if you have been divorced three times and this is your fourth marriage or this is your first, open discussions about money are pretty much the same.
Some of the basic questions to ask are:
1. Shall we have a prenuptial agreement? This is a very sensitive question and partners always feel that this question implies a lack of trust in a relationship. Due to twists and turns in one's life, a person should never assume relationships will be smooth forever. No matter how careful we are in choosing our spouses, circumstances alone can change a person -sometimes- for the worse. Some people may also have special scenarios like for instance, kids from a prior marriage who need to be protected via a prenup.
2. What is your credit history? Somebody's credit history can often reveal spending habits, debts, credit cards and bank accounts. Surely, you might want to think twice before getting committed to somebody who likes to spend $2000.00 for a nice outfit.
3. What will be our division of financial duties? You might be good in investments and your partner might be good in keeping track of all important financial documents. At any rate, these individual areas of financial expertise need to be revealed with each other.
4. What kind of debt do you have? Obviously, there is a big difference in having a mortgage loan and a credit card debt. You need to know if your potential spouse has financial common-sense in distinguishing between good debts and bad debts.
5. What are your career objectives? You might be aspiring to become a stay-at-home partner while your potential spouse expects you to have a full time career. Such misunderstandings need to be cleared up so that both people have a clear idea of what the other person wants.
6. Shall we have a joint account? Having a joint account adds a lot of convenience in running a couple's household. But some people also wish to have a solo account for their own personal use. There is no right or wrong answer for this question, but it needs to be clear among two people.