Ask anyone who's got married and most of them will tell you the same thing - what started as a simple, quick affair suddenly grew into something massive. There's something quite magical about weddings. The moment the engagement ring is on a girl's finger, friends, relatives and acquaintances crawl out of the woodwork to offer advice, to ask about the how, when and where and generally be a part of what started out purely as a fantasy trip for two.

It's much like having a baby actually - you realize that even strangers stop and ask and give you advice. So what do you do? Do you go with the flow or do you put the brakes on everything and go ahead with a small, private ceremony? It's so tough actually to say "No" to the well-meaning members of your family, the hordes of friends who would just love to have a great time at your wedding, and to your colleagues for whom a wedding is fun too. Somehow, weddings have become the glue, that keeps the social fabric from disintegrating. There's a coming together, a sharing, a camaraderie and a letting the hair down.

Now this is not just in Western societies. In fact, it is even more so in the more traditional societies all over the world. It really is a time to enjoy oneself. So when it is your wedding, where do you draw the line? When do you say enough is enough? Or do you just go along?

Well, very often, the engagement is a twosome affair - though more and more people are throwing engagement parties too. After that, the fun begins - there's the running around for the invitations, there's the choosing, the planning, the wedding clothes, the fittings, the rings, the bridal shower, the preparations for the wedding, the honeymoon - it just goes on.

The trick is to keep your cool right through if you are the bride or the groom. And to try and figure what you want and then stick with it. There really are a great number of things that need looking into, so if you can delegate, do that. And be extremely organized about it. Once you delegate, do not keep following up - it goes without saying that you delegate to responsible souls!

Then, relax. Never mind what goes wrong or right, just steer clear of all tensions so that when you are up there, taking your wedding vows, you do it with a smile, tension-free, looking forward to your wonderful life ahead. That really is what it's all about. That is the crux of the whole show - the culmination. As a bride or groom, never lose sight of that focus and everything else will just fall into place. It really is the first step to happily ever after.