Parents have to adjust to a new set of anxieties, power struggles, emotional volatility, and mental health issues that surface during the college years. Parents tend to worry about binge drinking, late night parties, and other unhealthy behaviors. These behaviors can be exacerbated if the parents? relationships with their children are on rocky ground.
When parenting a college student, parents can establish a positive relationship by adhering to three positive keys. These three precepts are: be a good Listener - listen when they speak; celebrate their successes; and hold them accountable and responsible for their actions.
Parenting College Students - Listen When They Speak
Parenting college students is not about instructing and taking control over their lives. It is about applauding and nurturing their independence. Your student is establishing their autonomy. The first key to establishing positive relationships is by listening to what the students have to say.
Parents must pay attention to what their children are saying, especially when issues arise in their lives that are important to them. We facilitate their growth and maturation by allowing them to solve their own problems. In doing so, our children will develop invaluable skill of problem solving which increases both their confidence and their self-esteem.
It is important to empower your child. In taking ownership of your young adults? problems, you are sending the message that they are incapable of doing for themselves. You can brainstorm options for your children, but allow them to make the ultimate decision.
Parenting College Students - Celebrate Successes
The second key to positive relationships is to celebrate their successes with them. These emerging adults need encouragement and validation from their parents. Your approval is important to them no matter what they say.
Tell your children they are doing a good job, and that you are proud of them. Be sincere. Children inherently want to please their parents.
Take the time to share in their accomplishments. Visit them at school, and attend their performances, whether it's a soccer game, piano recital, or homecoming weekend. In celebrating successes with our children, we are significantly strengthening the bonds of our relationship.
Parenting College Students - Hold Them Accountable for Their Actions
In parenting college students, actions speak louder than words. If your child makes a poor decision or an error in judgment, you can further a healthy and positive relationship by holding them responsible and accountable for their actions.
For example, if they overspend on cell phone usage, suggest that they work extra hours in order to pay for the bill. Young adults will learn life lessons from these experiences, and the lessons learned will hasten their growth and maturity into adulthood. In parenting college students, back off the subject once they have taken responsibility for their actions and judgment.
So, listen to what they say, celebrate their successes and hold them accountable for their actions. These are the three keys to positive relationships with emerging adult children.
Hopefully, way before you enter college you have most of your financial details such as rent, utilities, transportation costs, food, health care, laundry expenses, and tuition planned out. As a student attending college, your studies should be the most important aspect of school life. Yet, all of the rest come as part of the complete package.
Even if you believe you have everything covered, 89% of students will be paying back school loans when they graduate and this expense will have to be considered also. Let's look at some ways to make a little extra money with still having a social life, being an active student and all of the rest. The best way to do this is to make a little extra money while in school to help out with present expenses or future expenses.
We will look at a few part-time jobs that might work for you while in school that you can fit into your schedule and allows you to also enjoy life while you are there. A paper route may sound juvenile but it truly is not.
A paper route has many opportunities to choose a route that best fits your own schedule such as a Sunday only, or a weekend only route. Contact your newspaper and see what opportunities they might have. A landscaping part-time job also has flexible hours and can pay pretty well.
This can include mowing lawn, trimming, watering lawn and plants, shoveling snow in the winter or whatever is needed. Since it is not required everyday, this might be a perfect fit for you. Many areas are looking for mystery shoppers.
They are unknown people that review the quality of a store; the employees and the general pace of everything happening while you are there. The company that hires you pays you to shop and you choose your own schedule. If a part-time job is just not something you want to do there are other things that you can consider.
There are plenty of ways to save money. Consider living in a dorm. They are the cheapest option because you do not have to pay utilities.
Leave the car at home and purchase monthly passes for public transit available for you. Or ride a bike; it's cheap, no gasoline, nor oil expenses. Pay with cash for whatever you buy.
Credit card debt just keeps piling up. Go to discount clothing and grocery stores and clip coupons.
Buy used CDs and books. There is great entertainment that does not cost a penny such as hiking, going to parks, libraries, museums, coffee shops, etc.
Both Dr. Debi Yohn & are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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