Regardless of how and where change originates, there are 5 things you control which make it easier to embrace and that stack the deck in your favor to succeed at change. All require watching your language (and bosses respond well when you do).
1. Speak Specifics
When setting goals relating to change, vague is not in vogue. Always be specific. Be definitive. Be concrete. Ambivalence attacks the belief you can achieve your goal and sucks the energy right out of your desire to persist. You must train yourself to ban phrases like “I'm trying to do x” and “I'm thinking of doing y.” Replace them with “I'm doing x” instead. Be exact about what and when. “I'm getting my black belt in Lean Six Sigma this May” creates much more personal power than “I'm thinking of doing some more work on Lean Six Sigma.”
2. Ditch Denial
Ditch denial of responsibility. Forget fancy talk; keep it simple. Don't put control of events outside of yourself. Use present tense, active voice and indicative mood for greater power. Compare “I'd like to get it done” to Nike's famous example “Just do it.” You experience greater feelings of mastery and enhance personal effectiveness when you eliminate excuses for evading or reducing your responsibility.
3. Nix Negativity
Nix negative statements. No exceptions! They automatically limit you. You'll start to believe them and instantly hinder your progress. Turn all self-limiting, self-defeating “I can't” statements into positive ones simply by changing the semantics. “I can't” becomes “I choose to” or “I haven't yet but” and “It's too late” becomes “There's still time to.” Reversing negative talk immediately expands your possibilities.
4. Package the Past
Put all previous negative habits and self-defeating behaviors into the past with the phrase “I used to be”. Let all your ideas of self that aren't serving you well go. Don't hang onto them needlessly. Expressing them only in the past tense instantly categorizes them as things that have changed, are changing, or can change. As you think and say so you are.
5. Pitch the Present
Pitch all positive attributes and habits in present tense even if you haven't fully mastered them or aren't consistently applying them yet. This creates a demand to be congruent by living up to who you say you are and how you see yourself—you will not become the person you want to be if you are constantly telling yourself “I'm not this” or I can't be or do that.” Feel the difference between the person who says “I always find a way” and the one who always says “there's nothing I can do.”
Change does not have to be hard. Make it easier on yourself starting today!
Christian online dating has opened up many doors for many Christian singles worldwide. Hundreds of thousands of Christians have used the internet to make new friends, and start meaningful relationships from the comfort of home. They're realized the potential of their PC and their internet connection, and used them to completely change their lives. The more Christians that discover how these two practically everyday household items can change their lives, the easier it will be for everyone.
Once you have your internet connection and your PC all you need to do then is find an online dating service that helps Christian singles meet up with each other in a safe and secure environment. So first off you'll want a Christian online dating service that offers you a free trial. Better still, you'll want two or three dating web sites that offer you a free trial so you can experiment with the benefits that you're given to use, and not just limit yourself to one dating service. Limiting yourself to just one will lower your chances of meeting someone especially if you pick the wrong dating service first time, and you're completely put off of online dating because you made the wrong choice first.
Finding dating services that cater for Christian singles is easy. All you need to do is use your favorite search engine, and search for some online reviews. These will help you decide, and you'll also start seeing the same services popping up in the reviews, and that's because these are the Christian web sites that everyone is using. there are a ton of Christian internet dating web sites to choose from, but there's only a handful that will have enough singles living in your area.
Once you have a found a few that you like the look of, and you've heard many good things about them you can create your free accounts. When you create two or three accounts you can experiment with your profiles. You can put a different photo on each profile so you can find out which one gets you the most attention. Once you have found this out you can use the same photo on all the services then you'll start getting contacted more often on all of dating services.
Singles who have a photo on their profile will get up to 20 times more messages than singles who don't. And you can test this out by creating a profile without a photo, and compare the results with a profile that has a photo. If you find there's no difference then you at least know you need to change the photo. Some photos will do poorly especially if you use one where it is difficult to see what you look like.
After your photo is getting attention you'll want the contents of your profile to get you the messages sent to you. A lot of singles spoil a good photo with a profile that is either empty, boring or contains too much negativity.
Your profile needs to be positive in nature, and interesting enough to make another single want to contact you. Reading other profiles that come up in the same search results as yours will give you an idea of what not to do. Almost 90% of online daters make mistakes in their profile so if you make your profile different from all these you'll have a higher success rate.
Once you get your profile right you'll have a lot more interaction with other Christian singles online. Once you have discovered which Christian online dating service looks like the one that will give you the best chance of meeting someone you can upgrade your membership. This will give you more benefits, and will put your profile higher up in the search results so you get contacted even more.
Both Linda M. Lopeke & Jennifer King are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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