So here is the scenario we have all encountered: You are facing an impenetrable fortress. There are guards on the main entrance and you cannot get through without a secret password which is changed on a regular basis. The person you want to see is on the other side of the reinforced wall and is rarely seen in public!
What does this remind you of? Yes, right! It's that BIG PERSON who makes the decisions about who gets on the tender list who is sitting at a big desk behind the wall. How do you get through? Perhaps the question to ask before you even reach the wall is: "Who do I call?" "Who is the decision maker?" "How do I find out the right person to speak to?"
It goes without saying that even trying to penetrate this wall is crazy without adequate research and preparation. Checking out the company website may reveal all, often giving a list of directors and management personnel along with their job titles. You may even get an email address or a direct phone line number, although that would be unlikely in the larger corporations. In a larger organization it may not be immediately apparent who is the decision maker dealing with your construction sector.
So where do you start?
I have found that once you start to dig, you can uncover the identity of the person you need to speak to even if it takes a few phone calls. This is where keeping notes on all your calls is essential. You can easily build a company profile and structure chart and it's often the first person you speak to i.e., the person on reception who will help you.
There are a few obvious things to understand before progressing to your final objective:
1. Large companies and corporations are made up of smaller, autonomous units with their own staff structure and management responsibilities and once you have established the key pecking order in one, it will be easier to uncover the next.
2. The 'gate keeper', the person who answers the phone, has been briefed to screen all calls coming in and may not mean to sound aggressive and unresponsive.
3. Unless you have something specific to say, don't bother to call.
4. Don't be disheartened if you get a negative reaction on the phone. If you work with telesales often, you will need to have a thick skin in order to cope on occasions. Remember, don't take it personally, unless you've gone out of your way to be discourteous, in which case, you deserve it!
If you are having difficulty tracking down the right person to speak to about a particular project, here are a few approaches that have worked for me:
1. As soon as the phone answers, say, "Hi! I have a question about doing business with your company. Can I ask you?" A surprised receptionist almost always agrees. Then say, "I want to send a short letter that introduces my company. Would that be okay?" The receptionist generally says this will be OK. You now have two 'yes' answers! Finally say, "If I explain what we do, would you tell me who to address the letter to?" The response is almost always positive and you will get the persons name you need to contact.
2. If you are having difficulty finding out the right person to contact, often the Human Resources Department of major companies will help you out.
3. Another avenue would be to look at the Company's Annual Report which you find on a Google search on the internet. You will find key people listed and by contacting one of them, can usually find the right person.
4. A good way to build your database of important contacts would be through the trade press. Get names of people being interviewed in feature articles and check out who is writing about whom.
5. If you run high quality seminars on subjects of interest to the professionals you would like to work with, 'Continuous Professional Development' events, this is a great way of meeting people and providing them with a service. Kudos for your company and great networking for all involved.
6. If you get to speak to a lower mortal in the organization, mention their name when calling the Big Guns! "I've just been speaking to Chris in your HR department and he said I should talk to you about..."
7. Sometimes talking to the Finance Director of a company and offering to save the company money, can get you a direct link with the top person.
Most importantly, don't give up! If you are polite, but persistent, you can normally reach the right person! It is hard work and a little discouraging at times, but once you have cracked it, it's worth it!
You may believe there's no way of getting past this type of issue. You do not want to forget the good times that you have endured especially if those memories included children, of course, but there IS a way, not to forget, but to neutralise the way you feel about the painful ones.
Just as you can look back and laugh at an event that was, at the time, acutely embarrassing, you can harness that natural mental skill that changes feelings, and exchange hurt for a shrug and what was once painful even into a giggle!
Memories are something that we will have for a lifetime. These are sometimes good and other times they are hard to hold onto. There are some instances when all we really want to do is forget about the world and move on with our lives.
This is true for anyone that is going through a divorce. This can be the most difficult time of your life and you will have to make the necessary arrangements to keep the good memories and not forget the old, but CHANGE them!
Even if you have many bad memories, perhaps after a long marriage, you can still make changes.
I am not talking about re-writing history. I'd agree with you that that is impossible. What you must realize is that memories are happening in your head now - like a repeat of an old TV show - and since it is a present event, you can change it, just as you can change your mind.
You may be getting divorced after many long years of marriage. You will have had your share of ups and downs and it is important for you to hold onto the good memories so that you can keep a positive attitude towards life.
When you are going through a divorce, it will seem like everything will bring up a familiar memory to you. You will want to make sure that you are going to be able to deal with those times and all the feelings that come along with it.
You may have to find a way to cope with them and to get past the things that remind you of the good old days. In these moments, it's useful to have an "anchor" to hold onto.
Think of something that makes you laugh out loud - maybe a good friend who always gets your funny bone, or a favourite comedy moment that always cracks you up - and replay that in your mind over and over again.
Each time you feel the giggles coming on, just squeeze your thumb and finger together, (doesn't matter which ones, as long as it's the same one every time). After a dozen or so times, just the squeezing action will bring on a mini-giggling fit!
Now, when something unexpectedly brings up a painful memory, use your finger squeeze to over-ride it, and you'll begin to get the notion that far from being at the mercy of your feelings, your feelings are in fact under your control.
One of the worst aspects of grief and anger is the feeling that they're out of your control. Now they don't have to be!
Sometimes it is ok to have the fond memories come back. There are many times when you are going to have these feelings of old memories come rushing back. You will have the comfort of these memories as long as you are able to control the way that they make you feel.
You want to be able to keep these memories in the back of your mind but you also want to be able to get past the bad feelings that some of these memories can leave for you. These simple yet powerful techniques will help you to do just that.
You should remember that you will still have many new memories to make for yourself and your family. You want to take comfort in the fact that you still have a life to live and you want to make the most of the life that you have now. You want to go on and continue to enjoy the good things in life as much as you can.
The worst thing that you can do is to try to shut out the memories that you have created with someone that you loved even if now you are no longer in love with that person. Trying to shut out pain will only make you focus on it more, and shutting out the pleasant memories is to cause yourself more pain!
As you use these techniques, you will find more ways to accept the fact that the past is gone and that you now have to live for the future and what it holds in store for you.
A divorce is not the end of the world - it's also, like all endings, a new beginning - and you will want to find ways to move past the hurt and get to the good stuff that lies ahead.
Both Steve Flashman & Trevor Emdon are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Steve Flashman has sinced written about articles on various topics from Internet Marketing, Divorce and Infidelity and Telemarketing. Steve Flashman is a Marketing Consultant with a unique edge! He is a public speaker published author, recording artist, media broadcaster and communications expert.. Steve Flashman's top article generates over 165000 views. to your Favourites.
Trevor Emdon has sinced written about articles on various topics from Dating and Romance, Marketing and Communications and Online Dating. Trevor Emdon is a personal development author and coach. If you want to begin to , Trevor's self help program, "How To Love Again Whe. Trevor Emdon's top article generates over 165000 views. to your Favourites.