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[H1054]How To Embarrass Someone
by Jamie Hanson, Jam
Oh, love. It is hands down the most wonderful feeling in the world. It is as universal as the universe itself, and is more phenomenal than any religion, celebrity or virus can be. We are not quite sure who invented the word 'love', but the word itself gets the feeling spot on. You don't even have to be in love to know what I'm talking about. In fact, I can choose to not talk about love and you would still know what love is or how it feels.

We all give love because somehow we all want love.

But there are some unfortunate circumstances that make you feel different about love. Especially when the person you love won't love you back. Perhaps everyone will experience the other side of love at least once or twice in their lifetime. We will hurt a lot, cry a lot, and even eat a lot, all because of the agony of love.

It should be normal for us to recover from heartache after a period of time. But there are some who refuse to wait for time to heal all wounds by resorting to an uncharacteristic solution: hypnosis. Knowing how to hypnotize someone is unusual enough, but doing it to you is a whole new challenge. However, after doing some brief research, it turns out that hypnosis does help overcome the feeling of unrequited love!

If you are currently on a state of hurtfulness, then savor your tears because you're going to bid it goodbye after doing these helpful self-hypnosis tips:
- Spend an amount of time with yourself everyday without doing anything. Let go of everything and just lie down for a short while. Release the tension you have inside you by breathing in and out to relax your mind and senses.
- Start your hypnosis tape and listen to it with an open mind. Learn to absorb and relate to everything you hear and believe what the tape tells you.
- After listening, take a little time to reflect on how you live your life as a person, and then relate it as to why you are in that situation. Then comfort yourself by literally citing your good qualities. It takes a lot of effort to know how to hypnotize someone, so try not to confuse denial with the truth.
- List all the qualities that you love from the person that gave you your heartache. Keep in mind that it's the qualities that made you love the person, not the person himself.
- Come up with a word or a phrase which you can say to help remind yourself to fight the hurtful feeling whenever you're in a state of normal consciousness. Phrases like "love will come to me" or "everybody hurts sometimes" will do the trick.

These tips are actually helpful and easy to do, and it wouldn't hurt to do it everyday until you realize how much better you're feeling. Who knew learning how to hypnotize someone can actually be fun and helpful? See, we should all learn from love. Love is kind, love is pure, and most of all, love is patient. So be patient, people.

It might be because they aren't performing to your expectations; because you no longer need their role performed; or because they've breached the law or a company policy.

Whatever the circumstances, firing or retrenching someone is a confronting and often stressful task.

Here are some suggestions to make the process easier and less traumatic - for you as well as the person you need to dismiss.

Depending on why you need to let someone go - whether it's due to poor performance, a role that's no longer needed, or a legal or policy breach - here's what I suggest you do...

1. Poor Performance

Firing or relocating someone because of poor performance is often the trickiest situation because (a) it may be unclear why your employee is underperforming, and (b) depending on the relevant labor laws, it may be difficult for you to prove that he or she is underperforming and that you're legally justified in firing him or her.

So, if you are dissatisfied with someone, the first step is to work out why he or she has performed so poorly. Specifically, is it because of:

* You
* The organization, or
* The poor performer?

Beginning with you... are you managing the person satisfactorily?

This is important because not only may it be unnecessary to fire your staff member (i.e. you might find that his or her performance picks up simply by changing the way you manage) but you could also avoid a "wrongful dismissal" claim being thrust on you.

Alternatively, if both you and your employee work for someone else... has that "someone else" - i.e. your organization - somehow failed to provide enough resources for your employee to do his or her job properly? Is it failing to give you the support you need to carry out your management responsibilities?

If so, you may need to ask for changes or more support from the "powers that be". And remember, if the company is to blame... firing and replacing your employee will not improve matters.

Unless... it's your staff member - and neither you nor your company are responsible for the poor performance.

Is the employee ill suited to the role? Does he or she lack key talents, skills or knowledge? Are their personality clashes with you or other colleagues that are interfering with his or her work? Or are there personal issues that are affecting the employee's attitude or performance at work?

Above all, is there anything you can do about any of this?

If not - and you've done all you can to help your employee improve - then the writing in on the wall. You cannot afford to keep people on who don't pull their weight!

Nevertheless, this doesn't mean you can't fire someone in a fair and compassionate way.

In fact, you can make it easier by giving the employee plenty of notice - at least 1 month and up to 2 months if the job market is tight and you can afford it.

And if, during this time, you don't want the employee to continue doing his or her old job, give him or her other work to do.

Lastly, let the individual apply for jobs and attend interviews. Even better (if you can afford it), pay for him or her to attend career change training, where he or she will learn how to prepare, or update, his or her resume and apply for new jobs.

2. The Role Is No Longer Needed

If you simply don't have enough work to go around - or it's clear that a particular employee's role is no longer needed - you'll have to "retrench" him or her.

In this case, it's important to remember that the worker is not to blame for losing his or her job.

If you can, redeploy the employee in another role. But if that's not feasible try to be extra considerate when letting him or her go by providing plenty of notice, letting him or her apply for jobs on your dime, and paying for career change training.

3. Legal / Corporate Policy Breach

Now we come to what may appear to be the easiest situation in which to sack someone - where the employee has breached the law or a corporate policy.

Well, it can still be tough, if not tougher!

First of all, if you think someone has done something wrong, make sure you have solid proof before making any accusations or commencing the dismissal process. And comply with all corporate and legal requirements.

Secondly, be prepared to give the employee a fair hearing... and be prepared for what he or she has to say.

If there are extenuating circumstances, you might take these into account when deciding whether and how to sack the individual, depending on your professional, corporate and legal obligations.

For example, you might decide to put the employee on some kind of "probation."

Be very careful about taking it easy on someone who has clearly lied, stolen or breached your trust, though. While it might seem only fair to help out a person you let go because of poor performance, or because his or her role is no longer required... when it comes to a wrongdoer... I reckon you should cut the "dead wood" out of your team or organization before the rot starts to spread!

So there you have some general tips for firing or letting someone go. Hopefully, if you do need to use these tips, you'll find the task of dismissing someone much easier and less stressful.
Article Source : Pg. 9

About Author
Both Jamie Hanson & Anna Johnson are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.

Jamie Hanson has sinced written about articles on various topics from Home Management, Environment and Desserts. If you are really serious about learning and want an in-depth resource, then I sugg. Jamie Hanson's top article generates over 1500000 views. to your Favourites.

Anna Johnson has sinced written about articles on various topics from Generation Y, Careers and Job Hunting and Careers and Job Hunting. Anna Johnson is the author of the How To Manage People System, including her book, How To Manage People (Even If You're A Control Freak!). Get Anna's FREE 12-page report. Anna Johnson's top article generates over 14800 views. to your Favourites.
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