Although divorce may sound and appear easy for some, it actually requires a lot from both parties. Each one needs to get divorce consultations from lawyers and financial specialists to help them in the process. Hence, divorce is not easy, especially for the children. Endless fights for custody are usually the toughest moments not only for the separated couple, but also for their children. The children are generally the ones who suffer most when their parents separated.
Effects of divorce on children
According to studies, the children of a divorced couple often take the blame on themselves as the reason why their parents need separation. Some kids tend to think that they are the ones responsible for the failed marriage, thus, resulting to stress and anxiety.
One of the most notable effects of divorce on children is the sudden change of attitude towards activities and friends that they enjoy before. In addition, divorce can also cause detrimental effects to a child's perspective on relationship and marriage. Some children may regard divorce as a betrayal of their patients, hence, compelling them to be afraid and withdrawn from building or developing future relationships. Also, children of a divorced couple often find it hard to trust anyone as they grow up.
Lessening the effects of divorce on children
It is really up to the parents how they want to make the situation easier for their children. For starters, it is important for separated couple to have their children understand that the divorce is not, in any means, their fault. Another important thing is that the children know that they are safe, secured, and loved by their parents even if they are not together as a family anymore.
Divorced parents should also always be around or available for their children every time they are needed. When it comes to the welfare of the children, the separated couple should still work together in providing for their kids? emotional and financial needs
Role of a child specialist
In the process of divorce, collaborative lawyers may suggest to their clients the need for the children to have a child specialist who will basically act as the children's voice and guide in the entire duration of the divorce process. A child specialist is the one responsible in explicitly explaining the role and rights of the children.
Having a child therapist helps in the sense that the children will not be caught in between their parents during the process of the divorce. Choosing between two adults is hard for any kid. Having a child specialist in the process can also help minimize the emotional difficulties of the children as they cope to accept and try to live a normal life despite having a broken family.
Divorce causes extreme stress. Damaging impact of stress is much more than people ever realise. It alters the personality and the very thought process of people. In such a condition the divorcee can never be expected to perform well at the work place. The extreme divorce-caused stress gets augmented by job-related stress.
Such severe stress greatly affects health. 90% of all sicknesses are stress-related. Stressed and sick people can never be expected to do justice to their job.
This effect of divorce on career growth is not permanent in nature. Career suffers a setback in the immediate post-divorce phase. But human nature is resilient. Once people make the necessary adjustments for solitary living they concentrate on their job and make up for the time lost. This is the stage when career growth resumes after the temporary break.
Divorce and its Damaging Impact on Career
Divorce is undoubtedly one among the most stressful incidents in life. This separation causes great internal frustration created by unfulfilled dreams. The consequent grief is a blocking obstacle that prevents people from fully concentrating on their work. Lack of effective contribution subsequently affects their work life. Statistics prove that the income earned by women reduces by 18% during this period.
Post-divorce phase is marked with unhappiness and rapid changes in daily life and routine. Parenting patterns were once a shared responsibility. In the post-divorce phase, a single parent (most frequently the mother) turns the custodial parent.
Custodial parents are often not able to accept the much-desired-for promotion or job changes. That would prevent them from spending adequate time with their family. Many parents prefer to spend time with their children rather than at office chasing career dreams.
Even if some people do accept the much-cherished developmental offer, they subject themselves to great stress. They strive to be a perfect parent to their divorce-affected children, while constantly struggling to prove their worth at the work place. Such continuous pressure induces deep stress that ultimately leads to a breakdown.
However, these difficulties are not faced only by the custodial parent (mother) alone. Divorce affects the work life of even the non-custodial parent (the father). For divorce induces stress in both, the leaver and the left. Men react to stress by becoming aggressive or turning to alcohol or drugs for relief. The impact of substance abuse or negative behaviour on job and career growth need hardly be enumerated.
Post-Divorce Career Growth
Some people speak of career growth in the post-divorce phase. This statement sounds paradoxical. Divorce induces stress that prevents people from concentrating on work. In such a scenario, how is career growth possible?
Quite frequently childless people report of career growth in the post-divorce phase. They concentrate on their career to take their mind off the pain they are experiencing. Work proves a good stress buster in such circumstances.
Devoting more hours to work and facing and overcoming the challenges presented, give them a sense of control. This feeling of being in control is necessary for the well-being of every person. It also helps offset the utter helplessness they felt during divorce, when their emotions were not in their control.
In this manner childless people cope with the negative aspects of divorce. Divorced parents adopt slightly different mechanisms. They too concentrate on their career, but, it is only after they have cleared their responsibilities towards their children.
After the initial period of stress and enduring the grief, divorcees slowly adjust to a life of solitary living. Career growth begins at this phase. Men are left with reduced family responsibilities. Work provides the much required positive outlet. They experience a change in their net income levels also. Post-divorce men experience a 14% increase in their income. This is due to the fact that their income supports lesser number of people than before.
Women quite frequently sacrifice their career for taking care of home and children. Divorce necessitates their re-entry into the job market. They slowly attempt to build up their career from where they had left.
Career is deeply impacted in the initial post-divorce period. For, divorce causes stress and stress negatively impacts all aspects of life including career. Subsequent adjustment soon directs attention of people to career. Many people are seen performing better in their work place than during the pre-divorce period.
Both Rcon Franchesca & James Walsh are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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