Physical abuse is obviously the most common, and well as the most dangerous. If your ex has ever hit or shoved you, or thrown things at you, you need to seek help immediately. This is nothing to play around with, and if your ex has hit you once, it is a pretty much guarantee that it will happen again and again. This type of aggressive behavior is unacceptable and no one deserves to be treated this way.
Mental abuse can be deadly in a way that it can tear your self-esteem down, and convince you that you are not worthy. This type of person will torment you and lead you to believe that no one in his or her right mind would ever want you. You must understand that this is their own insecurity speaking.
Some of the characteristics of the person who is mentally abusive would be the possessive and controlling person. Often mental abuse is not detected until later on in the relationship. When we are in love, we have a foggy perception of things, and we tend to make up excuses for the other person, or perhaps we just get comfortable and we overlook things.
Some forms of mental abuse are not quite as obvious as others, for example, being judgmental and critical, of not just you, but your friends and family as well. Being critical of you, everything about you, your hair, nails, clothing, your size, the cleanliness of your home, your car.
Being judgmental of your friends and family. If your ex judges people around you, they are probably judging you as well, and in my opinion, it is wrong to judge, critcize and condemn other people, and you want to steer far away from this.
The last one is pretty obvious, if your ex is the type to scream and yell and call you names, you may want to re-think your situation, to determine whether or not you even want to get your ex back.
Most often, the person who is verbally abusive will belittle you, not only to you, but also in front of your family and friends. Pay close attention to how they talk to you and about you especially in front of your family and friends. If they are saying unkind things about you or to you, do some serious soul searching before you attempt to get back with your ex. Everyone deserves to be happy, it is your birth right, so claim it!
If you have noticed any of the 3 types of abuse in your relationship with your ex, take my advise and do some serious soul searching. We are only put here on this earth one time, and it is much easier to be happy with who you are with.
For the ones that have not noticed any of the above, I am very happy for you and I would recommend you read more below on about how to get your ex back. Word of cautious, this stuff will blow your mind away. Not the typical information that you hear.
That is understandable. Even with maximum effort and the best of intentions many relationship do not work out. But let's be honest, you are not really giving it your best shot. Do you want someone new? New in the sense that you want out of the relationship you are in now. Old in that you have been there and done that. In other words you want to get back with your ex.
There is a tendency in human nature to believe that if you were in a strong vibrant relationship that suddenly ends that you will never be able to find anything like it again. That is not true but oftentimes perception is reality.
Worse still is when you do enter a new relationship; everything (and everyone) is measured in comparison to your ex. Trying to live up to a memory can be a major burden to anyone looking to be in a relationship with you.
Before moving forward into any new relationship, you may want to consider a few things concerning you and your ex
1. No One Is Perfect
They were charming, wonderful, the love of your life and an absolute gem. Are you missing anything? Yes, they were also painfully human with certain traits and habits that drove you nuts. Just as there is no such thing as the perfect person, there is also no such thing as one hundred percent compatibility. It takes two to tango and they brought an equal amount of foibles into the relationship just like you.
2. It Was All Your Fault. NOT!!
There is a tendency after a break up to indulge in a little revisionism. It was all your fault because of whatever. Yes your partner was not perfect but you should have been able to overcome all of these obstacles.
Stop right there. When a relationship goes sour it is very rarely just one person's fault. Take off the rose colored glasses, step back a minute and analyze the person and the relationship. You should be able to pinpoint moments when the fault lands squarely on their shoulders.
3. Qualities Like No Other
Okay nobody does or says x, y or z like your former partner. True but what people miss is that we are all incomparable. No one is like you and no one will be like your ex. That does not mean you put them on a pedestal and measure every person by that standard.
What it does mean is that you accept the qualities of the new person and understand they too are incomparable. Realize they have traits that your ex will never have and consider it a good thing.
You think you cannot live without your ex. Of course the final decision is yours but keep in mind you broke up for a reason. Do yourself a favor and put out that torch you have been carrying. Do not deny yourself the thrill of meeting someone whose qualities are all their own and feels strongly about you. Give them a chance and leave the past in the past.
Both Paula Snyder & are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.