It was 6.30am some months ago when I woke up to the news. They said that members of the Vatican and members of some politically antagonistic group were getting together for 'talks'. I had a rather striking thought. What if they were getting together for 'Listenings' instead of for 'Talks'?
What would it be like to hear 'Who would like to be listened to first?' Normally, you don't know for certain that everyone round the table has the uppermost purpose of deliberately listening to you. That is, listening to your every word until you have finished.
Attending a meeting with the objective of listening is so very different from attending with the objective of giving people your thoughts and opinions.
What difference would it make? People would pay far more attention to what's being said, they wouldn't be trying to work out what to say next, they wouldn't be judging what's being said nearly as much as usual and they'd not be so quick to get their word in. Progress could take place fast! Meetings would take half the time!
**Do you really know how to listen?**
Let's be honest, people don't really know how to listen properly, or at least they don't put as much effort into it as they do in getting their ideas across. Of course, this doesn't apply to you - or me for that matter, because we both know how important listening is and we're always diligent in this area, aren't we? Actually, we can be completely forgiven for not listening properly all of the time. It takes enormous effort and when we're under pressure with a thousand thoughts that we're trying to hold in our heads at once it's practically impossible.
Even under calm circumstances, it's very hard to listen fully to other people's ideas. By listening I mean listening to every single word from the start to the absolute finish to what they are saying without interrupting or straying in thought to other matters like trying to understand what they're saying or wondering what's for lunch or working out what you're going to say next or wishing they would give you a chance to get a word in or finishing their sentences for them.
As well as finishing their sentences for them out loud, there are also the times you do this silently in your head. At times like these you are not fully listening to the other person, even though you think you are. You are, instead, listening to your own thoughts.
**We listen to ourselves most of the time**
The only thing is, that listening to yourself and finishing other people's sentences can get so habitual that sometimes you can get mixed up. You can think you are listening to the other person, however all the time you've actually been listening to yourself. You are more likely to get mixed up like this when you are under pressure, when you don't like, do not agree with and are critical of the other person's ideas, or that they, in any way, make you feel less than fine.
I've seen seasoned sales people go into a knee jerk reaction when a customer has said "It's too expensive". They feel uncomfortable and start to get all defensive as if the customer has said, "I don't want it". They know they haven't said that and yet they still respond defensively instead of dealing intelligently with the objection.
**Our internal chatter is often not helpful**
The trouble with listening to what's going on in your head - your internal chatter - is that you'll end up replying to that rather than to what the person's saying to you. Your internal chatter can put you into a negative emotional state and then put you into that 'knee jerk' reaction rather than enabling you to respond appropriately.
If you had responded to the actual idea rather than to your version of their idea or your emotional reaction to their idea, you'd reach a satisfactory conclusion much more quickly. If you don't, this can consume hours and hours during your week and it'll take so much longer to get what you want.
As soon as you finish reading this, I'd like to encourage you to listen to yourself.
* observe or hear yourself listening to your internal chatter
* listen to yourself talking to the other person
* listen to yourself listening to the other person. If you do this properly you'll be duplicating what they're saying
* watch yourself to see how you react to your internal chatter
The more you do this the more you'll be able to catch yourself going into your knee jerk reactions and you'll be able to adapt your communication to get more and more of what you want more quickly.
There are many reasons that people look into buying discount rugs. But unfortunately, there is one big reason that a lot of homeowners pass this by. Do you know what that reason may be? Simply put, some people do not think that they can get what they want from a discount rug. There are some myths surrounding these, and if you do not get past these, you will never be able to save money when purchasing rugs for your home. Luckily, if you know about these myths, you will be able to purchase discount rugs, which will in turn save you a lot of money.
Here are three myths that surround discount area rugs as well as some details that will show you why they are not true.
1. Many buyers think that discount rugs are not going to be of high quality. Although this can be true, it is not a myth that you should buy into. As long as you know who you are buying from, as well as what you are getting, you should never have to worry too much about the quality issue. You should always remember that discounted prices do not necessarily mean discounted quality; this is simply not the way the rug industry works.
2. Buying discount rugs does not mean that you are getting something that has been used, or has a defect. When it comes down to it, many sellers discount the price of rugs because they have too many in stock, or they are simply not selling. All in all, it has nothing to do with the actual rug itself. Remember, the rug industry is a very big one. In order for sellers to make room for the latest and greatest, they need to clear out inventory that is not making them money. In turn, buyers are the ones who can benefit.
3. You can find discount rugs in a number of different places. Not only are there land based stores that will discount the price of their pieces, but there are online stores where you can turn to as well. No matter where you shop for discount rugs, you should keep in mind that there are many locations available to you. For this reason, you may not want to buy from the first store that you come across in your area. Take the time to consider what you have to choose from, and then make a decision that will suit your needs. You can try searching online or try visiting some local rug stores to do some price comparisons.
There are many myths that need to be dispelled when it comes to discount rugs. You should never let any of these myths hold you back from getting the piece that you want for your home. Instead, you should know the many myths that surround this industry, and then ignore them when you are shopping. This is the only way to make for 100 percent certain that you get the rug that you want without having to spend an overabundance of money.
Both Julie Ellis & John James are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Julie Ellis has sinced written about articles on various topics from self improvement and motivation. Julie Ellis from The Communication Training Company is an expert in showing you how to communicate effectively and how to deal with difficult people. You can find out more by collecting a popular free report worth £67.50. To get "The Three Steps In Deali. Julie Ellis's top article generates over 60500 views. to your Favourites.
John James has sinced written about articles on various topics from Cheating Spouse, Home Management and Home. John James writes about at and how they can help accent your h. John James's top article generates over 60500 views. to your Favourites.