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No doubt dating online or off, you have been and are been tested by women. Why? Well that's a long winded answer, and I gave up physco analyzing women a long time ago. Even women will admit they can't understand themselves! So what chance do us humble males have?
Zip! None! Zilch!
So best to just ACCEPT that they do and will test us. Be aware of it when it happens and deal with it in a way that gains us the authority and understanding in the relationship. Below are some examples of how women test us.
Why the testing?
1. They test us to see how strong emotionally we are.
2. They test us to see how smart we are.
3. They test us because they crave drama in their lives.
4. Some test because they enjoy making us uncomfortable.
5. They test us because they can. :-]
The following examples are tests from the type of women you do not want to get involved with. So be aware of, and try to avoid these types of women.
Let's look at the tests.
1) The old 'outrageously flirting with another man in front of you' test.
2) The old 'yelling at you for checking out another girl to see what you do' test.
3) The horrible and dreaded 'canceling a date at the last moment for no reason' test.
4) The worst one of all, 'getting you really turned on while making out and then saying no to see if you really respect me' test. [I really don't like this one.]
There are many, many more tests but this is enough for the purpose of this article. Now let's look at ways to RESPOND to these nasty little tests as opposed to REACTING.
1) The old 'outrageously flirting with another man in front of you' test.
a. This one was really tough to take with a woman I was in love with for a long time. I thought she would grow out of it. But she didn't. What I learnt to do however was to ignore her when it happened and enjoy my evening by chatting to other women or friends of hers. The best thing you can do is to NOT make a mention of it or big deal of it. If possible strike up a conversation with either her good looking friends or other women at the venue you are in. This will cool her off and if it doesn't, you may have an unsuitable partner who will flirt every time you go out. You can only change yourself and your emotions so it's unlikely she will change this habit. If she flirts, ignore it and enjoy your night. If she is always a flirt, you need to move on from her, she is trouble.
2) The old 'yelling at you for checking out another girl's arse to see what you do' test.
a. To start with, try to avoid checking out other girls in her presence. This gives you integrity and a style above others. If she does lose it without reason for doing so, she is likely insecure and looking for drama. Don't yell back at her and calmly tell her to settle down. Smiling, tell her you are going to spank her when you get home if she doesn't behave. This should defuse it, by getting a laugh and she may just want you to spank her! :-]
3) The horrible and dreaded 'canceling a date at the last moment for no reason' test.
a. This is really disappointing isn't it? You are about to walk out the door and she sends a sms
Canceling. The most effective way to avoid this is to mention that one of the worst things women can do is to not show up and cancel dates. If you state this when you arrange for a meeting, it does help prevent it from happening. We are all busy and need to plan ahead to be effective. However be careful not to write her off as she may have a legit reason for it happening. If it happens twice in a row, she's gone…don't put up with it!
4) The worst one of all, 'getting you really turned on while making out but then saying no to see if you really respect me' test.
The toughest one of all. Best to back off a little and be calm about it. Don't sulk or push it. Just relax and have a bit of fun somehow. If you are cool about it and she can see that you aren't stressed, she'll likely relax and you have passed the test. Then just gently start making out again.
Chances are you have proven that you respect her by remaining calm and playful.
There you have it. You will be tested, that's life, How we respond to it is the key…
All the best,
Mick Jones
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