In higher levels of dispute the issue is carried further to an arbiter who would resolve the issue based on an accepted truth. Oftentimes and ordinarily that route is not taken for reasons of time and resources.

In our daily grind, there are and there will always be conflicts because of difference in standpoints, and "disputed passages". A line from the book "Disputed Passage" goes "we learn even from those who disputed the passage with us." Beautiful!

I have not always been a contentious person. I just did not have the energy to waste over what to me is trivial and something which will not have an added value to my life. Well, that may not be entirely correct. I was in the Debating Team in high school. I led my team in the issue on the use of the English language as medium of instruction in the Philippines. We won on the Pro side. I reasoned out for myself that there was added value in the exercise because, we got additional points to our final grades and I got a prize as Best Debater.

The episode was forgotten. In the years that followed I was again the uncontentious one. That was so until one fine day, when I realized I have just been elected president of a 700-man strong employees? labor union. That would mean Collective Bargaining Negotiations. One would need more than debating skills here. It was tough to face a management panel of hardliners. Passing the bar of good negotiations was not about prevailing over the other side of the negotiating fence but the other side's accepting your arguments as reasonable. It was about making room for all viewpoints and making all viewpoints meet. It also made me realize that differing views does not necessarily lead one to the warpath.

Listening to what others have to say may, after all, add to what you may not know. It may open more windows from where you can see the world at large. My change of heart came in knowing that hearing out and being heard comes with added value, after all.