1. You started climbing up the ladder and realized that after the third step that your legs won't stop shaking

2. You started a project and skipped part D and now realize that you have just enclosed your hammer in the finished section

3. You find yourself drinking way too much beer celebrating the completion of each section.

4. You ask your wife if she remembers which wires your friend the electrician said NOT to cut.

5. You call your friends to help out and they all seem to have that ?virus ? thig-a-ma jig.

6. You keep calling and harassing contractors in the yellow pages asking questions and trying to disguise your voice.

7. You turn on the faucet and hear a large explosion in the basement.

8. Your dog hides and covers his eyes with his paws when you reach for tools.

9. Your wife says to her girlfriends that the only thing that resembles a contractor is how your butt crack is hanging out.

10. Well?The 10th reason is simple. You know you are not a contractor when all nine of the problems listed above happen.





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