'If only my husband could be more understanding.'

'If only my boss would die!'

'If only my son could be more motivated.'

'If only I could get better customers',

These are the common litany of excuses one would hear.

People who believe themselves to be victims say that the only way for their lives to change for the better is when other people get better, or if the business-social environment improves.

As long as you keep thinking that it is not your fault, that something else must change, you will continue to feel helpless and powerless. By continuing to play the victim, you will be totally at the mercy of your environment

Why do so many people Choose to be a Victim?

Time to time, we find ourselves unconsciously lapsing into victim mode till it leads to being an undesirable part of makeup Do you have friends and acquaintances who complain non-stop about their employers, colleagues, spouse, society at large, or the government?

How about you?

Without any intention of being cold and heartless, the fact stays; as long as people convince themselves to be the victims of circumstance, they will never be able to take charge, learn from their experiences, move on and change their lives for the better.

Why do we do this? The simple reason being it makes us feel good! By playing the victim, we get lots of sympathy, don't we? At the same time, we want to feel assured that we were in the right by justifying our own actions.

Soon, complaining becomes therapeutic. After all the complaining, we actually feel relieved of an emotional burden.

Beneficial as it may seem, though playing the victim appears to have lots of payoffs, the cost of doing so is high for as long as we blame something or someone else, we rob ourselves of the power to take charge, and change the situation.

Giving Excuses and Blaming Others Takes Power Away from You

The reality is that most people act in a way that puts others in charge of their life.

When something doesn't work in their life, they choose to give excuses, blame others and complain. The problem with this is that by doing so, you are putting others in control of your life. You put yourself in the role of victim.

This is the reason causing most people feel totally helpless, with no control over what is happening to them. Most of the time the outside world will not change, not until we change first!