When a guy is really enamored with a woman, they often find that they are more willing to be a little different, make a few sacrifices that don't really coincide with who they really are, and are mostly in the deal to get laid as the guy who she believes he is. Yet for every insincere act there is an accompanying price. It can be so easy to convince yourself that you're happy in the beginning, that these small changes are nothing more than pay acting, role playing, or a continuing effort to give her what she really wants. Yet all that insincerity turns around to bite you sooner or later.

The most insincere guys in the world never make beyond a few bounces around the bedroom with any one woman. It just doesn't stick. After awhile, the lies, the pretending, and the cliche building intentions get old. In some instances, men end up showing their real self and lose the woman. What makes it so ironically sad is that she probably would have gone for him the way he really was.

Using insincerity to woo women means that sooner or later, you and she need to start the process over once again. All that anxiety ridden "will she like me" business has to go through a second trial, only now she doesn't trust you. Once she knows that you were faking it, she isn't flattered, but feels used and duped and stupid. While wants that?

Sincere relationships start with a basic understanding. Each party understands that you are entering into a process of getting to know each other, working out differences, and testing the waters for longevity. Insincere relationships almost never work out because sooner or later she is going to find out that you started the relationship on fraudulent terms. We have all seen the B rated movies where the guy pretends to be someone he isn't only to accidentally fall in love with the girl he was pretending to be with. There's a big chaotic scene where he tries to explain himself, she blows him off, he's miserable, and in the end she forgives him and they start over. Get out of the movie, guy. It isn't like that at all. Women don't like to be lied to. If you're going to lie to them about who you are, then chances are pretty good that you are going to lie to them about everything else.

Even if your intentions aren't all that serious and you simply want a few good dates, someone to join you for some fun activities, and the luxury of knowing that you are sleeping with someone disease free, you are limiting the scope of the relationship and the possibilities that it could bring if you are not sincere. You might not expect to fall head over heels for her or you might think that you're just not ready for commitment. What happens when things change and suddenly you realize that the woman you're now spending every day with is the woman you want to spend forever with and she is about to find out that you're a liar? It happens. And when it does it is really rather messy. Why go there and make things so unattractive for everyone involved?

When you base a relationship on a foolish notion, you are telling yourself, and her, that you aren't worthy. It's a slam on you. If you want a relationship of any type, even casual, don't you want a relationship that allows you the freedom to be acceptable and one that acknowledges that you are a decent human being? Lying undermines your own value. It is time consuming and exhausting. And just when you think you have it in the bag, you blow it and once again you're alone.

Some guys really go for play acting, role playing, and driving home as anew guy on a regular basis. While their choice is theirs and they may claim to be very happy with it, what they aren't doing is driving home with any woman who will be accompanying them regularly. Instead, they have already doomed the relationship to a one night stand (which can be a very exciting time to play act) or a two or three times around the bedroom situation. It isn't becoming to insult a woman that way, and it sure doesn't lead to life long happiness with your partner. Eventually, you might even forget who you really are and struggle to find you again.

I guess I have always taken a different approach. I figure that if a woman wants to be with me, whether for a night or for life, then she should want to be with me as I am. I don't want to think that being someone else could be more attractive than who I am. Is it self delusion? I doubt it. Since being me, a complete me, has attracted more women for more reasons than any persona or faked person ever did. You gotta give women a little credit as they usually can tell when a guy is being ingenuine. In fact, many women can pick the guys in the room who aren't being themselves just by the way they carry their body or gesture with their hands. It's a scary and perfectly freaky talent that women have, but I have witnessed it with my own two eyes.

Women can be remarkably forgiving when they find out that you aren't so perfect and that you have a little roughness around your edges. It's a beautiful thing. What women can't forgive is being used, being lied to, and being involved with someone who can't "man up" enough to shoot it straight.

Don't be afraid of you and women will be more easily opened up for you. Take that any way you choose. Women have an innate sense of being able to love in a very nurturing and complete way that makes a man feel big, strong, and full of life. It's worth taking the time to get to know yourself so that you can then take the time to let a good woman get to know you in return.