While ADHD is commonly recognized in children, most people expect adults to be able to hide the fact that they have a problem. Social gatherings and meetings can cause a lot of anxiety in someone who suffers from ADHD and this can even cause them to avoid social situations. It doesn't have to be this way, though. There are coping strategies to make even the most important meeting go well.
Concerns
Most ADHD adults have difficulty staying focused on conversations for any length of time, so it's not hard to imagine how trying it is to understand an entire meeting or speech. Unfortunately, those moments when the mind wanders are often the most important ones and this can cause problems later on when the facts are needed.
A social function, be it a picnic or a company party, can be emotionally and mentally exhausting if you are struggling to pay attention and to avoid blurting out something inappropriate. What should be fun turns into something more like work and requires a lot of energy just to make it through a couple of hours. This is the reason that many ADHD adults avoid social gatherings and prefer to spend their downtime away from other people.
Fortunately, there are ways to stay more focused during these social outings, making them less stressful and easier to deal with.
Strategies for Social Situations
-Keep it simple. Whenever possible, keep the social situation as stress free as possible. Choose to go to a movie or show instead of hosting or attending a party, which can be very distracting.
-Take notes. While this is not something you'll want to do in front of people, it can be handy to keep a notebook on hand to jot notes on people throughout the event or meeting. This can be invaluable when you need to contact someone again or talk to your boss about the meeting.
-Listen more than you talk. Even if your attention tends to wander, it's a lot easier to be in a social situation where you don't really need to say anything. Most people are more than thrilled to talk about themselves, so all you need to do is ask a question now and then and you'll be rewarded with plenty of talking.
-Find a way to be interested. Think about how you can use the information gleaned in the meeting for future projects. Many ADHD adults find that when they are interested in something, they really can focus on information input quite well. All you need to do is find the method of promoting interest in yourself.
-Opt for enjoyable outings. Rather than force yourself to go to a dozen corporate Christmas parties over the holidays, why not look for something you enjoy more, like a concert? Attend only the social gatherings that you absolutely must and the rest should be ones that you enjoy and feel comfortable with.
-Take someone along. Having a spouse or good friend with you allows you to break away from time to time when you simply can't stick to a conversation. Also, having someone who understands you can be a big help when you are feeling uncomfortable and lets you join someone who will understand if you are in need of a break.
ADHD in adults can cause some serious problems in social situations if you don't have a plan. Know what you can do to stay focused and to avoid embarrassing situations before you go in. This, coupled with support from a loved one, can help make all the difference in how you approach these gatherings.
I thought I was just shy for years and years, no really I did. I never thought that feeling uncomfortable in new social situations was any more than that I would get tense and start to feel agitated every time I had to meet new people. Later on when I got married, yes I actually met someone who understood, it was quite daunting when my wife would return from work stating that so and so had invited us around to have dinner with them. God, it was all very horrible. I was a nurse for many years and never felt this way when I was working, strange though that must sound. However eventually I started training as a counselor and therapist and had to undergo some therapy sessions myself. I finally decided to face up to this issue and revealed it to my therapist who was extremely understanding and told me it was much more common than you might think. In fact meeting new people is actually just behind fear of public speaking as a concern for many.
Eventually we utilized some techniques that to my surprise actually took the nervousness away, I mean completely. For the first time in years I felt free to be myself and let go and be much more amenable in social situations. What were those methods some of you well may ask. Lets have a look.
Some years ago a new psychological technique emerged called Thought Field Therapy, it was created bu a clinical psychologist, Roger Callahan.
His new technique involved tapping with your fingers on certain acupuncture or energy points and doing a particular sequence whilst thinking of the issue that is unresolved. Imagine the surprise of the majority of people when deepest seated phobias, fears, anxieties of all kinds and even long term post-traumatic stress disorder vanish, and im not joking here or hyping this up. A friend of mine had terrible stage fright (similar to public speaking fear I guess) and he tried this method and in three rounds of tapping his stage fright left town and hasn't returned. It is now being researched within psychological circles and of course the initial reaction of the psychological and psychiatric community was disbelief.
However, it does remind me of Francine Shapiros EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) technique which when it first became accessible to the public was scoffed at by the medical establishment worldwide. Now though it has had some very good research which shows that it is slightly better than traditional cognitive-behavioral treatment and is faster and more cost effective as a modality.
So if you want to try something new look up Thought Field Therapy or Emotional Freedom Technique which some practitioners use. instead. Look it never hurts to try something new, look it up on google to see if there is a practitioner near you, it might just work wonders for you, it did for me.
Both Amy Nutt & Lee Heather are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Amy Nutt has sinced written about articles on various topics from Culture and Society, Recreation and Sports and Women. doctor provides solutions for situations that can prevent you from doing your best at work, school or in relationships. For treatment and recommendations of ADD and A. Amy Nutt's top article generates over 368000 views. to your Favourites.
Lee Heather has sinced written about articles on various topics from Web Development, Public Speaking and Health. Lee Heather is a therapist specializing in anxiety issues and teaches clients stress management. His main approach is to show clients how to 'switch off' the brain stress centers for the most profound sense of deep relaxation they've ever experienced.. Lee Heather's top article generates over 1900 views. to your Favourites.