For many decades (perhaps since the Age of Reason), the Western World focused on cognitive intelligence, generally referred to as IQ. We assumed a high IQ was the ticket.
However, you may have noticed, as early researchers in the field did, that IQ is not the only answer, and sometimes not the most important part of the equation. Even an IQ-genius like Einstein states that there is something more going on ? that his theories were leaps of intuition. Daniel Goleman is often misquoted as saying that EQ matters more than IQ, when what he actually said was ?it CAN matter more.? Haven't you found this to be true?
EQ draws on the continuing phenomenal new research on the human (triune) brain and what emotions are and how they operate -- neuro-affective science. Lust, for instance, comes from the reptilian brain (the oldest, and therefore the strongest), and for good living, we mediate this with the limbic brain (it would hurt my wife if I had an affair) and the neocortex (I could lose all my money in a divorce if I have an affair).
As we fumble around for definitions, please keep in mind, intuitively if you will, that EQ is one of those things that you know when you see it. Think for a moment now of someone you know who is successful (hopefully it is you), and toss around in your mind some of the things that make this person's life work. IQ, perhaps, and also perhaps flexibility, intentionality, ability to assess gut-feelings, ability to work with others, self-management. We even use words like ?character,? ?patience,? ?maturity,? ?affability,? ?leadership,? etc.
An operating definition of emotional intelligence is (wikipedia): ?an ability, capacity, or skill to perceive, assess and manage the emotions of one's self, of others, and of groups.? The definition is evolving, but keep in mind that you know it when you see it. For instance, I prefer to use the term ?competencies.?
Emotional Intelligence probably began with no less than Darwin, who pointed out the importance of emotional expression for survival and adaptation. Slowly research turned to the non-cognitive aspects of ?intelligence?. As early as 1920. E. L. Thorndike at Columbia University coined the term ?social intelligence? to refer to the ability to understand and manage other people.
Among early researchers in the field, Howard Gardner (Frames of Mind: The Theory of Multiple Intelligences) used the terms ?interpersonal intelligence? (to describe our ability to understand the intentions, motivations and desires of other people), and ?intrapersonal intelligence? (the ability to understand oneself, to appreciate your feelings, fears and motivations). In 1985, Wayne Payne published a doctoral thesis entitled A study of emotion: Developing emotional intelligence. Salovey and Mayer were also key researchers in the field (1990). It is perhaps Daniel Goleman who popularized the term in 1995 with his best-seller, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ.
Is EQ better than IQ? See my video on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch'v=n7x8URq-lJI
Salovey and Mayer have a good working definition of emotional intelligence: "The ability to perceive emotion, integrate emotion to facilitate thought, understand emotions, and to regulate emotions to promote personal growth". Four categories that make sense are: (1) perceiving emotions, (2) using emotions, (3)understanding emotions; and (4) managing emotions.
A movie that illustrates concepts of emotional intelligence is Orson Welles? powerful ?The Tragedy of Othello: The Moor of Venice.? In this case, it is an example of emotional intelligence gone bad. This is, of course, Shakespeare's tragedy, Othello, and from this came Verdi's magnificent opera, ?Otello? which we also consider. The place of music in emotional intelligence can hardly be underestimated, BTW, and of the great arts in general.
In the beginning of the story of Otello, we see a man at the height of his power. [Bear in mind that the definition of a Shakespearean tragedy is that the hero is undone by ?a character flaw? not by some external event (such as war or illness)]. Otello was a general, at the top of his game, with a successful career, and a loving marriage to the beautiful Desdemona.
At the end of the movie (play, opera) we see a man who has destroyed his life, killed his wife, and proceeds to kill himself. The aria Niun mi Tema is one of the most powerful arias in opera. It means ?No one need fear me any more,? and is the lament of a man who was undone by emotions.
What happened? Otello failed to promote a man (Iago) who then set about to do him in, and he did it without laying a hand on Otello. Iago understood Otello better than Otello understood himself, and he used this to bring about Otello's death and destruction at his own hands, manipulating him around like a puppet on a string. See my video on youtube here: http://www.youtube.com/watch'v=xgQOdtW1CI0.
Why study emotional intelligence? To paraphrase Sun Tzu, who was talking about warfare, understanding how people can be manipulated through emotions is as useful for those who wish to avoid having it done to them, as it is for those who wish to practice it.
If you stop and think about it, you can get in touch with times when your emotions either facilitated or blocked your ability to function well, make good decisions and/or use good judgment. Emotions, after all, give us information ? it's what we do about the information that makes the difference. Maybe you drove away a lover by something you said in anger, or jumped in (or out of) the stock market on an emotional whim, or gave a poor speech because of anxiety, gave in to lust and ruined your marriage, or got angry and told off your boss and got fired, or talked back to a judge and ? See my video, ?The Top 10 Things You Say After You've Been Hijacked (by the reptilian brain)? here: http://www.youtube.com/watch'v=QmMSKLJo2Oc .
There are several assessment of emotional intelligence which vary in their terminology, but some of the competencies are resilience, flexibility, personal power, nonverbal communication, emotional expression, intentionality, authenticity, and empathy or compassion.
Should it be ?empathy? or ?compassion?? How DO you define emotional intelligence? These are largely academic matters. YOU know the quality that we struggle to define with ?compassion? or ?empathy? and YOU KNOW know that it ? and the other competencies ? matter. And the most important thing is that unlike IQ, EQ can be learned. I know. I teach it.
What's another good definition? Many of my clients have called emotional intelligence ?the missing piece.? And then there was one who said, ?your course saved my mind.?
This might sound odd, as the concept of emotions is a very subjective one. Every person deals with situations or things in their own way. Emotions are something that is specific to only that particular person and finds its root in the personality of that person. So the reactions of different people to the same situation may be different because of their different personalities. These reactions and emotions form the essential groundwork for our character to build on.
Even before we were born, the specific way our bodies and minds would develop, had already been determined by our genes. All the information about the mixture of our hormones, to our reactions to chemicals, to even the color of our eyes had already been encoded in our specific genes. Along with these features, and many more, even our level of intellect had been already determined. We might make efforts to increase our knowledge, but or IQ level remains the same. This, however, is not the case with our emotional intelligence.
We display our emotions based on out external environment and the situation we are in. so these emotions are only our reactions, and not something we carry with ourselves from our birth. In fact, our growth and development during the initial years of our life, to a great extent affects our emotions. This can be proved by the fact, that when babies are born, they have no knowledge about the negative and positive emotions. But children who are starting to walk are further proof of this.
Even when they are not taught how to walk at first, it is something inside them that gives them the sign that this is something to be learnt. They then start learning how to walk, without any fear of tripping or falling, neither is any fear of failing in this endeavor present in them. It would not be possible for them to take their first few precarious steps, if they had any of these fears.
One of the important aspects of our development is our emotions. All the learning that we have received through our various experiences in the past culminates into the final product of emotional intelligence. If we want, though, we transform our negative or unwanted emotions into positive and meaningful ones through learning the appropriate ways of using their emotional intelligence.
Thus, emotional intelligence should ideally be taught at an early age.
There are certain guidelines for teaching emotional intelligence, developed by Daniel Goleman, who is a psychologist and author and these five points ensure that this teaching is able to change lives.
1. It is important to identify and understand the emotional states of people. To take this one step further, it is also important to understand the relationship between a person's actions, his thoughts, and emotions. These are the first things to be taught.
2. The new important point is to teach the people how to manage their emotions properly. This is the way to transform your unwanted emotions into emotions that can be put to better use to create some value out of them.
3. Thirdly, it is also important to train people to handle their success and achievements especially during an emotional state of life. This can be done through developing a positive outlook and way of thinking, which is anyway an important aspect of one's well being.
4. The fourth is teaching how to enhance the ability to sense the line of a person's emotions.
Through this, we can also gain the sensitivity to understand and empathize with other's emotions.
5. The fifth and the last point is judging and enhancing the capacity of a person to be able to enter into, and sustain a harmonious relationship with the other people around him.
Teaching emotional intelligence no longer remains a difficult job, if one understands all these points.
Both Susan Dunn & Abhishek Agarwal are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Susan Dunn has sinced written about articles on various topics from Emotional Intelligence, Flirting Tips and Emotional Intelligence. Susan Dunn, www.susandunn.cc, sdunn@susandunn.cc . Susan coaches individuals and trains and certifies coaches internationally. She is the author of numerous ebooks (. Susan Dunn's top article generates over 40500 views. to your Favourites.
Abhishek Agarwal has sinced written about articles on various topics from Surveys, Camping and Camping. Abhishek is a self-proclaimed Personality Development Guru and has written several books on this topic! Visit his website and Download. Abhishek Agarwal's top article generates over 368000 views. to your Favourites.