During the lawsuit, each side can make arguments about how it wants things to turn out, but the judge has the final say in shaping the outcome of the dispute. At the end of the lawsuit, the judge issues an order that legally binds the parties to everything he or she has decided. This often leaves people feeling trapped because important parts of their lives are now defined by a court order they had no hand in shaping.
Collaborative law is a way to help people stay in control of decisions about their own lives. In a collaborative process, the parties and their attorneys sit down together outside of court and look for creative solutions that benefit both sides. Since they typically know more about themselves and about each other than a stranger in a black robe will ever know about them, they can make their settlement fit their particular circumstances better than a judge might be able to do.
Of course, the collaborative process does not work for everyone. Sometimes a dispute is so contentious that the parties will not be able to shape a settlement agreement to their mutual advantage. In those cases, it may be necessary to fight it out in court and leave the final decision in the hands of a judge.
People who can sit down at a table with the opposing party and collaborate on a resolution of their dispute will be able to keep more control over their own lives. Their agreement will still be legally binding, because they submit it to the court where it is incorporated into a traditional enforceable judgment, but they can be more confident that the terms of that judgment are better suited to their unique situation.
Couples around the world have chosen collaborative family law because they wanted to make decisions about their own circumstances that will keep them from getting caught up in a lawsuit. Once litigation begins, it can leave the parties feeling like they are no longer in control, but dragged along by a process that often seems unsympathetic and unfair.
The difficulty of divorce comes from untying all the knots created in the marriage. Litigation only adds to the entanglement. Even worse, in most cases, it feels more like the court is cutting those knots than untying them. Most divorces will not be pain free. But if divorcing spouses are able to stay in control and make their own decisions, then the outcome can be far less damaging to them, their children, their families, and their friends.
The decision is yours. If you choose traditional divorce litigation, your decision making power will soon end, but if you choose collaborative divorce your decision making power has just begun.
Imagine what it would be like if you could run a profitable six, seven or eight figure business and enjoy as much freedom as you desire? For many, the moment you decide to grow your business you simultaneously think of all the hard work ahead. You begin to question the dream and wonder if it's really worth it.
That's because you erroneously believe that the only path to making more money is working more. You fear you will have to give up on your precious dreams of spending more time with the kids, traveling to exotic vacations or even just having the freedom to enjoy your Tuesday any way you like.
What if you could tap into a simple way to achieve your dream - without having to work more?
Well, that's what I did. I found a simple way to accomplish my bigger dream by leveraging the power of a virtual team. A virtual team can be virtual assistants, contractors or experts who work from their own home to help you accomplish your tasks in record time.
The problem is that many people know about this strategy but still don't do it. I hear reasons like, "I can't afford it, I don't have time to teach someone else, I can do it myself, etc." But the one that always breaks my heart is, "I'm afraid to let go of the control. What if my team doesn't do it right?"
Control-Freak-Itis is a common syndrome among entrepreneurs around the world. It's almost like some type of genetic code is implanted that says, "No one can do it as good as me so why bother!"
Actually, if you have a dream to make consistent revenue over six figures while enjoying a lifestyle then you MUST learn to let go so others can help you. You will need to build a team. It's impossible to experience your desired success any other way. There will never be enough time and energy to accomplish it all.
So how do you overcome Control-Freak-Itis so you can delegate effectively?
First, you have to change your MINDSET.
You might do something well but that is not a reason to do it. Timothy Ferriss, author of The 4-Hour Workweek, says "You need to create space to do what matters most." For instance, if you are good at tweaking your website but you are worth over $100/hour when working with a client or doing an interview, every hour you spend on your website is a waste of your time because you could pay someone $35/hour to fix it.
That means you have to come to terms that just because you are good at something doesn't mean you should do it. Would Donald Trump fix his own site? Nope.
Second, you have to know WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT.
Is it more important to get done perfectly or to get done? The answer should be the second one but many of us waste weeks on end trying to get things perfect. There is a great saying, "Good is good enough!"
Recently I began to delegate more and more of managing my team to a couple of key individuals. It allows me to stay focused on growing and creating rather than being a manager. Does it always get done EXACTLY the way I want? No. Does it get done in a way I can live with? Yes. And as my friend Ali Brown, says, "No smaller children or animals were harmed." =-)
Third, you have to hire the RIGHT PEOPLE.
The single greatest mistake that entrepreneurs make when building their team is to hire from their gut alone. Our instincts play an important role but when interviewing candidates, there is a specific process you must use to ensure you get the right people in the right roles. Otherwise, chaos and disappointment can ensue.
In our last Virtual Team Building Tele-Bootcamp, a participant uncovered (finally) that the person who was not completing projects on time and who was avoiding her calls was not a bad person, just a bad fit for the role. When you discover how to identify the RIGHT candidates, then your team begins to work like magic.
Fourth, you have to have SYSTEMS.
A good system defines how and when something will be done. The idea is to be able to replicate an activity so it gets done the way YOU WANT. With proper systems, you can pretty much hand off anything to anyone (even a 16 year old) who can take care of it for you.
Systems can be created for how you respond to an email or phone call, the thought process you use to evaluate an opportunity or even a script for following up with a potential client. The reason many business owners shy away from giving up control is that they have not yet created a system so they don't know HOW to get someone to do it the way they want.
Fifth, you have to have TRUST.
Trust is what comes when you have the four steps above. Trust is earned through consistent, predictable behavior that is aligned with your target goals. Trust is what allows the Control-Freak-Itis to melt away so you can truly accomplish massive results with a team.
If you find yourself slipping back into micro-management or controlling behaviors, it's likely that your trust has been compromised and it's time to revisit one of the previous steps. The important thing is that you recognize the signs early enough to repair the relationship so you can go back into trust.
Both Erin Rhames-childs & Melanie Benson Strick are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Erin Rhames-childs has sinced written about articles on various topics from Legal Matters, Web Development. Erin Rhames-Childs is a divorce litigation and collaborative attorney who provides services for divorce, child custody, child support, spousal support, adoptions, guardianships, grandparent rights, domestic partnerships, and more. Visit us on the web at. Erin Rhames-childs's top article generates over 1300 views. to your Favourites.
Melanie Benson Strick has sinced written about articles on various topics from Debts Loans, Web Development and Internet Marketing. Melanie Benson Strick, Million Dollar Lifestyle Business Coach, teaches entrepreneurs how to stop feeling overwhelmed so they can create more money, freedom and prestige. Revolutionize your results with a free chapter from, The Power of The Virtual Team,. Melanie Benson Strick's top article generates over 6600 views. to your Favourites.