In the last ten years the divorce rate in the United Kingdom, has almost doubled. Statistics show that in 1961, there were 27,224 divorce cases in Great Britain and by 1969 it had more than doubled to 55,556. By the early seventies, the United Kingdom registered a staggering 1,24,991 cases. This could partly be attributed to the Divorce Reform Act, which came into effect in 1971. That was then, the beginning of the 21st century has seen divorce becoming a norm rather than an exception.
The New Avatar of Divorce
In the instance that there has been a slight drop in divorce rates year on year, the reason is mainly because there is a drop in number of marriages. Increasingly, women are choosing careers over marriage, single parenthood is rampant and the average age of people getting married is on the rise. Given then that marriage is not hastily entered into, divorce on the other hand doesn't seem to have any speed breakers!
In fact, in the UK, 1 in 5 men and women who got divorced had a previous divorce behind them. This figure is up from 1 in 10 ten years ago. In the UK and world over, there are fewer and fewer "fault divorces", i.e. neither the man nor the woman is blamed, instead, divorce occurs due to changing needs, incompatibility or divergent interests.
Divorce in the 21st Century-The Cause
Increasingly people the world over seem to believe that tomorrow will never come and instant gratification seems to be the current mantra. Though the average age of divorce in the UK has risen from 39.6 to 43.1 years for men (in the last ten years) and 37.0 to 40.6 for women, as mentioned earlier this is more as a result of rise in age at marriage. Men and women seem not to want to spend even a moment more than necessary in an "inconvenient" situation. There always seems (apparently) that there is something (or someone) bigger, better and greater out there. Running to catch that errant dream, reality is not given too much credence. We don't need statistics to tell us that marriage today, is not considered a "holy" union and "till death do us part" is what fairy tales are made up of. Divorce today is just a means and definitely not the end.
Divorce - Is It Really The Answer?
When one studies divorce related statistics in the UK, it can be alarming. One can be forgiven for being cynical and imagine that a happy marriage is the thing of the past. What then is the solution one might ask. Though Marriage counselling has been around in the UK for a considerable time, it is still a good option to prevent a divorce. Despite 40% of marriages in the UK ending in divorce, when marriage counselling has been sought seriously it has proved fairly effective. Of course it is not an overnight solution but requires hard work and an honest attempt to make this work. It helps a couple work through perceived issues and address the real ones.
A temporary separation also works as a viable option to give a couple space to understand the consequences of an impending divorce. A separation also affords healing time and a couple could ?date? each other to bring back the romance in the relationship.
While extreme cases where abuse, cheating etc is involved one might say that divorce does offer a way out to the aggrieved party. However, in cases where boredom and ennui have set in, where misunderstandings have been blown out of proportion, where career seemingly take priority, one does imagine that has to be an alternative to divorce.
Of course, one sure way of preventing a divorce is to avoid ?marrying in haste and repenting at leisure?. Living together offers a couple a chance to understand what they can expect from a life together and while there is no guarantee being careful before tying the knot does help allay false notions.
Life however, is bound to come a full circle and whether in the UK or elsewhere, this too shall pass and hopefully a good old fashioned marriage will be back in fashion!
Let us analyse these factors and try to find out the reasons for the high divorce rate in the UK. This analysis would help us to compare the problems of married couples in the UK and India and contrast the divorce rates between these two countries. Divorce facts are compared and contrasted with India, because, India has an extremely low rate of divorce.
Why do People in the UK Divorce?
Lack of Communication
Many women divorce petitioners feel that their marital life would have been happier if their partners communicated more. Marriages are built on love, and constant nurturing through positive communication increases love.
Extramarital Affairs
Many marriages could have survived extramarital affairs if only the guilty spouse would have confessed. Non-confession enrages the wronged partner into seeking a divorce.
Seeking Help
All couples fight. But when fights turn persistent and assume vindictive hues they have to be resolved by a counsellor. Many marriages could have been saved with a counsellor's help. Unfortunately, married couples do not like to discuss their problems outside the close friend and family circle.
The most common reasons for British couples to divorce are lack of communication, extramarital relationships, none to counsel, and domestic violence. These reasons have led 42% of married couples in the UK to opt for a divorce.
Now, let us compare and contrast this with the scenario in India. Indian married couples face all the problems that plague their British counterparts. Yet, divorce rates in India are as low as 1.1%. The two main reasons that prevent divorces in India are the family structure and religious beliefs.
Joint Family System
Extramarital Affairs
In a joint family, all the members of the family are monitored by the elders of the household. Erring spouses indulging in extramarital affairs are frowned upon. This acts as an effective barrier in seeking relationships outside marriage, for no member would like to antagonise the entire family.
Counselling
The older family members counsel the younger generation if they face problems in their married life. This has helped save many marriages.
Addiction and Domestic Violence
Addictions of any sort and domestic violence are not allowed in joint family systems. In nuclear families, it is difficult for the solitary spouse to prevent habitual addiction or domestic violence in the other partner. Here, the support offered by the family helps the victimised spouse deal with such problems.
Finally, joint family members find it difficult to divorce their spouse. For, divorce does not mean just a separation from the spouse, it means severing ties with the entire family as well.
Divorce rate in India was 7.4 per thousand a few decades back. It has increased to 11 per thousand. Urban couples are divorcing more than the rural people. This trend can be explained by the fact that urban couples live in nuclear families while the rural people belong to the joint families.
Apart from the family structure, religion also plays an important role in preventing divorces. Religion has a strong impact on how people view women, marriage and divorce.
Spiritual Equality of Women
In India, religion treats women on par with men. No religious function is ever complete without the participation of the wife. It is also the duty of the wife to see that the family members are spiritually oriented. Such orientation acts as a divorce-preventive measure.
This spiritual equality of genders is not found in the UK. Religion favours men and even God is referred to in the male gender. Change in the traditional approach to make religious practices women-centred might have a positive impact on divorce rates.
Religion, Marriage and Divorce
Marriages in India are deeply religious affairs. The religious stamp sustains marriages.
In any country, low-conflict marriages are a norm while high-conflict marriages are an exception. Low-conflict marriages must be worked upon and high-conflict marriages should end in a divorce.
In India, the family structure and religious views prevent low-conflicting couples from divorcing whereas, in the United Kingdom, divorce rates are high for no preventive measures exist to stop mildly conflicting spouses from getting divorced. These marriages, if worked upon, would have eventually turned into a happy relationship over a period of time. It would also be a good idea to condition children to become good spouses when they grow up. This is a practice adopted in India.
James Walsh has sinced written about articles on various topics from Small Business, Binding Machines and Divorce and Infidelity. James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you want to find out more about a solicitor managed see. James Walsh's top article generates over 368000 views. to your Favourites.