Just like you approach Retirement (no one has come up with a better name yet) you can create a refreshing attitude toward your mid-life path. Your 40's are no longer considered as old as they used to be; neither are your 50's or 60's. Retirement isn't as it used to be. So, for example, what terminology would speak more truly about these times of your life?
The Encarta Dictionary (an efficient and complete dictionary generally found in the home of children) states that middle age is: *The period in somebody's life when that person is no longer considered young,usually between 40 and 60 years. *Typical of somebody middle aged characterized by the behavior, attitudes, lifestyle or interest considered typical of middle age, especially staidness, conventionality, or old fashionedness.
If you are within these ages, do you consider yourself part of this definition? Are you staid and conventional and old fashioned? Is that how you want people to see you?
Let's move on to the Encarta's definition of retirement. *The act of leaving a job or career or near the usual age for doing so. Being away from busy life; a state of being withdrawn from the rest of the world or a former busy life.
Do you desire to spend the next 30 years or more being withdrawn from the rest of the world?
There definitely needs to be some more accurate words to describe this stage of life that you are experiencing! Mitch Anthony calls it The New Retirementality. Rick Miners and Jeri Sedlar call it Rewiring. What do you call it?
Your mid-life can be the best time of your life. It's simply a choice you have. It is a time to relax, appreciate your family and friends and view life from a different perspective. It's a time to either work or not work. To find employment in something you have always wanted to do and never did or to totally go out on a limb and do something you had never even thought possible for you.
You may feel more control at work and in your families and in your social lives. You continue to grow, accept yourselves and your bodies. By now, you have experienced adversity and you have come through the other side. You appreciate what you have and your relationships. This makes you more confident and competent in whom you are now. You are in the unique position of planning this essential and exciting stage of life. Your experiences have taught you that you can go after what you want and that you can achieve it.
Your maturity comes with a wealth of coping skills and a comfortable sense of self. You have earned all that you have and you have much to look forward to in the years and decades to come. You have access to your own wisdom which will help you reach your own answers to your own questions. That doesn't sound like much of a crisis.
So what are some action steps that you can take today to joyfully and with gratitude begin to explore this time in your life? Here are a few suggestions that may help:
1. Choose a fun name for your "retirement" or "mid-life". Maybe you are "rejoicing" or "basking in the sunlight"? 2. Take 5 minutes to write out on a brightly colored piece of paper who and what you are grateful for in your life. Post this list somewhere so that you see it daily. 3. Think through your life experiences. What are 5 activities that you have enjoyed? Which ones would you would like to do again? Or which of these activities gives you ideas of something new to try? Do at least one activity in the next month. 4. We all admire someone or something. What could you plan to do today that would reflect this same attitude or action you admire in someone or something else? Do it. 5. Who do you hold dearest to you? How could you show your love for them today? Make plans for a simple but loving expression.
Are you having fun yet?
Ever since turning 35 years old I've had a nagging feeling that my life had somehow changed. Where once there was wonder and amazement at the simple things in life like a cloudless summer day, or the unspoilt scenery of the countryside, these things stir little inside of me. It takes a lot more to excite me now than a few years ago. I talked to my friends who were the same age as me, and yes they felt the same way. What was it - what's changed?
We came to conclusion that it was hope we had lost - the hope of a better tomorrow. When we were younger the future was always there and we'd always be young enough to change our lives and change our fortunes. The realisation that we've reached and passed the peak of our lives is a shocking one. It's too late for me now to get that degree and become a lawyer. I'm never going to go to university and then on to become a world famous brain surgeon. Don't get me wrong, I love my life and I love my family, it's just that I always thought that one day I'd make the 'big time'.
I've played guitar and sung since I was nine years old. Learning more and more songs and even writing a few of my own. I believed that one day I'd make it. Perhaps a talent scout would hear me play or I'd get around to making that demo tape and sending it off. Sadly a hundred and one other things got in the way - girls, cars, motorbikes, work, marriage and kids. I wouldn't change any of that for the world, but now I'm in my mid-thirties it's finally occurred to me that my big break's just not going to happen.
The answer to being happy once in your mid-thirties is to fill your life with the things you always wanted or thought you might one day have, just on a more realistic scale. Thus begins my quest for musicians to jam with. I tried the band thing when I was a teen and wasn't impressed. There were too many people with large egos trying to railroad everyone else into doing it their way. Now I'm more mature, I'm looking for people like me who just want to enjoy playing music for the sake of playing music. I've readjusted my dreams. Now I just want to find some people to play with. No false hopes of becoming famous and gigging way into my seventies! Just regular guys and girls who also have lives they love, but want to play music with others.
For me playing the guitar and singing helps me feel grounded and at peace with the world and I know others feel the same way about their music and their instruments. It's important not to lose sight of the fact that just because we're not young doesn't mean life is over. As long as I'm still physically capable I will still be playing my guitar and singing my heart out. The dream of strapping the guitar to my back and riding my motorbike off into the sunset might be gone now but that doesn't diminish the pleasure both give me.
So who cares if my band is never going to get a song in the charts (or even play on stage at Butlins!)? Does it really matter if I'm never going to be a champion motorcycle racer? There are enough people in my life who love me and enjoy listening to me playing guitar and singing to make me feel perfectly happy with today.. and tomorrow. Now that I'm finding people to play music with my wonder at the world we live in has finally returned.
Both Kim Kirmmse Toth & Graeme Salmon are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Kim Kirmmse Toth has sinced written about articles on various topics from Web Development, Web Development and Health. Kim Kirmmse Toth is a certified life coach. She works with baby boomers on the many transitions faced including the non-financial side of retirement planning. She may be contacted at: kim@myretirementbydesign.com or at her website:. Kim Kirmmse Toth's top article generates over 720 views. to your Favourites.
Graeme Salmon has sinced written about articles on various topics from Keyboard Synthesizer, Web Development and Music. Graeme Salmon runs helping amateur musicians find others to play with.. Graeme Salmon's top article generates over 590 views. to your Favourites.