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[S718]Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid

by George Siegal, Geo

People are the same way. You see someone on-line or in a bar, maybe some friends set you up on a blind date, and the package looks pretty good. But then as you get to know that person and start peeling away the paper it was better before you started opening it up.

Getting back to that present analogy, sometimes you can tell by the size of the box or by shaking it that you aren't going to like what you find inside. With people there are some obvious clues as to what's under the wrapper. If they seem angry early on, chances are you're getting an angry person. If they are late for that first date, maybe it's a coincidence, or maybe it's a sign they will always be late. If their clothes don't match and that bothers you, beware. If you are a conservative republican and their passions are Greenpeace and Global Warming maybe there's a sign there. If you are an intellectual, and the other person would need you to spot them 10 points to get their I.Q. up to 100, they might not be right for you. To be blunt, someone dumb rarely gets smarter. And if you are no rocket scientist and the other person acts like a card-carrying member of the Mensa society you could be wasting your time.

However, there's another side to this for those of you wandering through the shallow pool. Sometimes the box that looked like a dud has something pretty great inside.

I grew up watching Monty Hall and let's make a deal, and when someone won the box, they always wanted the bigger box, when they got that, the curtain was an easily accepted upgrade. The next thing always looked better. But quite often in the trade for the bigger box or curtain what they got wound up being a dud, the person should have kept what they originally had.

The reality at least from a most of the guys I know perspective is we all want the hottest babe in the bar, in our minds we probably think we have a shot at her, but we might be missing some great opportunities with all the others.

If the wrapped box appeared to be less than perfect, wouldn't you just kick yourself for throwing away a diamond?

Copyright 2006 George Siegal

Every relationship has its ups and downs, but how you handle these disagreements may be the defining moments that will ultimately determine your happiness and that of your partner. Instead of arguing over every little thing, learning which debates are worth it and which are not will help to keep your love intact.

When you spend a lot of time with someone, such as a mate, there will undoubtedly be disagreements. Minor arguments may involve where to eat dinner, what to watch on television, household habits, which movie to see or what to do this weekend. More often than not, these issues are better left to compromise rather than a shouting match. Alternating decisions will help to ensure that both you and your partner will get to enjoy your favorite things. For instance, you may get to choose tonight's movie and your spouse can choose the next.

Both parties in a relationship need to maintain their own lives, which is why it's perfectly normal to enjoy doing things together and still spending some time apart. Perhaps she wants a day of pampering or shopping with her best girlfriends and he prefers poker night with the guys or a weekend trip to a sporting event. Having this time apart is important and should never be the subject of a serious disagreement unless it constantly interferes with your time together as a couple.

If you should find yourself in a heated situation, avoid the temptation to blurt out the first thing that comes to your mind. If you do, remorse will inevitably follow. Rather than saying something that you may later regret, take a few minutes to cool off before returning to the conversation. Leave the room or the area where your mate is and spend several minutes alone. This will give both of you the chance to think about what needs to be said and how best to explain it in a rational way. Choosing your words and when to use them in a relationship is essential to working through your problems as opposed to creating new ones. When you resolve one issue completely, it is also less likely to be verbally tossed into the next argument.

In some cases, you and your spouse may find yourselves at an impasse. If this occurs, simply agree to disagree and try to move forward unless the argument involves infidelity, dishonesty or an otherwise potentially unforgivable act that may require couple's counseling or a complete reevaluation of the relationship. In some cases, financial issues can also be a real problem. Because money is the number one reason that most couples fight, it is not something that should be ignored or overlooked when it comes to spending habits and/or budgets. In every case, it is better to discuss and resolve the issue rather than allowing it to fester without taking action to correct the problem.

Article Source : Mature Dating

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Both George Siegal & Alex Daniels are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.

George Siegal has sinced written about articles on various topics from Flirting Tips, Dating and Romance. George is one of the creators and hosts of MyLoveBytes.com. You can catch his blogs and videos at . You can learn more about George and hisP. George Siegal's top article generates over 1900 views. to your Favourites.

Alex Daniels has sinced written about articles on various topics from Culture, Family Concerns and Marriage. Alex is a consultant for an online gift shop specializing in. Alex Daniels's top article generates over 60500 views. to your Favourites.