Cases of abuse against women, children and even men make headlines all the time. Brutal cases even manage to make their way into national news. But if the parties involved or those who knew the abuse was ongoing took action, these headlines may never have required ink. There are ways to break the cycle of violence and it is especially important for those who have children living in the home. Whether the kids are at risk or not, they are being affected greatly by events in the home.
Many will say that children belong in a family with both a mother and a father, but if abuse is present, the alternative is the best choice. This is so for a number of reasons, but most important is to protect the health and well being of the children. Whether the little one is being physically abused or not, damage is being done. Lessons are being learned and future actions of that child when he or she is an adult might be guided by what happens within their own home.
The little girl who watches her mother take a beating may think that's "normal" or "okay." She may very well find herself in the same position down the road. The little boy who watches his father hit his mother may think that's how a man is supposed to act. The child who is abused doesn't deserve it and certainly cannot protect him or herself from the adult's action.
While it's true many a family can be saved from the vicious cycle through counseling, anger management training and more, the smartest thing for the non-abusing adult to do is to seek help. Oftentimes this may lead to a huge shakeup in the family living arrangement, but in the long run, the effort will be worth it. If the abuser can be helped, great. If he or she can't, at least you and the child will be safe.
There are many domestic violence organizations available to help. Some communities have full-service shelters that can help immediately by taking the abused and removing them from the home of the abuser. These programs will generally also offer counseling, housing assistance, job training or placement help and even emergency food, clothing and more. Some shelters even have their own on-site schools.
When abuse is present in a home, it's not a time for acquiescence or apathy. This is especially so if children are present. There are ways out of the situation and many times the integrity of the family can be saved. If all parties are willing to seek help, the abuse cycle can be snapped into pieces. If they are not, there is still hope for the abuse victims to pick up the pieces of their lives and go on without further bruising or psychological damage.
If you or someone you love faces abuse or you happen to be the abuser, the first step to stopping the cycle is seeking help. There are plenty of people and agencies willing to assist people in making a fresh start. The first step, however, begins with you.
Now here is a little psychological insight that will open doors for your recovery from psychological, mental and emotional abuse.
Go ahead and get your coffee or herbal tea because we're going to have another one of those psychological conversations.
Thought-Emotion-Physiology
When a little thought registers in our minds—when we intentionally or unconsciously think a thought—limbic system activation occurs. Now the limbic system is the emotional brain. It's the place in the brain where emotion is registered.
This limbic system activation triggers a hypothalamic-pituitary response, as though the emotional brain is telling the primitive brain how to gear up in order to prepare the body to meet the demands of what IS...what lies before you.
Now this primitive brain (hypothalamic-pituitary) triggers specific glandular activation that subsequently sparks specific body system responses that prepare the body to carry out the necessary action, or inaction, to meet the demands before it.
So it is apparent that the thoughts we think and the images we hold in our mind's eye yield what we feel and how we act, right?
Finding the Thought Behind Distressful Experience
Now let's imagine that you are experiencing the emotional distress associated with current or past verbal, mental or emotional abuse.
You feel the upset emotionally. And, fortunately for you, you can find the thought that is driving this emotional discomfort. Here's how.
If you close your eyes and pay attention to the part of the body where you usually feel things, chances are the emotional distress will both magnify and localize in that region.
By staying with this bodily "felt sense" with bare attention (i.e., not analyzing; instead, merely witnessing), words can then bubble up as though to articulate (explicate) what's personally meaningful. As renowned psychologist Gene Gendlin, Ph.D. showed me in the 70's: what's implicitly meaningful becomes explicit.
Releasing the Thought Driving the Distressful Experience
Now once the words speak themselves, you have the thought behind the distressful experience. If you put that thought to inquiry, guess what happens? You will discover that you have indeed attached to a thought that is NOT true for you. It is a thought that has separated you from what is more authentically YOU.
As the work of Byron Katie demonstrates so eloquently, once this cognitive lie makes itself apparent, that is once your story is seen as no more than just "a story," then the thought can let go of you.
And once this happens, the emotional distress associated with that thought vanishes, leaving you at peace with yourself emotionally and psychologically. I have both experienced and witnessed this thousands of times and to this day I still hold reverence and awe around the precision of this psychotherapeutic technique for healing emotional abuse.
Now, I'm aware that I have provided you with some rather esoteric practices here, but I promise you that inside this article is a message of hope. In summary:
a) You can pick your thoughts.
b) You can find the thought behind emotional distress.
c) You can engineer the release of thoughts that cause emotional discomfort.
In a nutshell, you can heal the emotional pain from psychological, mental and emotional abuse.
Both Jessica Deets & Dr Jeanne King Phd are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Jessica Deets has sinced written about articles on various topics from Interest, Acid Reflux and Heart Conditions. Jessica Deets researches the internet and finds helpful information. You can find out more about helping and overcoming abuse at . Jessica Deets's top article generates over 60500 views. to your Favourites.
Dr Jeanne King Phd has sinced written about articles on various topics from Divorce and Infidelity, Legal Matters and Writing. For more information about from Within, visit. Dr Jeanne King Phd's top article generates over 6600 views. to your Favourites.