1. Wordy Phrases. Many compound phrases do not compound meaning. They are either repetitive or have one-word equivalents. Frequently, "legalistic" language is an offender; phrases that use too many relative pronouns (who, that, which) cause clutter and confuse your reader. Even articles can be excessive (the word "the" wears out quickly when used excessively in a single sentence).





Poor

this is to inform you that we have

for the sum of

in the event that

on the occasion of

prior to the start of

a small number of

during the time that

due to the fact that

in the same way

at an early date

remember the fact that

not in a position

most of the time

in view of the fact that

until such time when

we are of the opinion that

with reference to

without further delay

as a result of

for the month of December

Improved

we have

for

if

on

before

few

while

because

similarly

soon

remember

unable

unusually

since

when

we believe

about/regarding

now/immediately

because

for December

2. Infinitive Substitutes. Whenever a phrase substitutes for an infinitive (the verb form with "to" in front of it, giving it no particular tense, person, or subject), the sentence will be longer, and your meaning will be harder to get. Using the infinitive gets to the point sooner and makes your purpose clearer.

Poor

In order to be a successful writer, hard work is necessary.

He went to the library for the purpose of studying.

The employer increased the salaries so that he could improve morale.

Improved

Hard work is necessary to be a successful writer.

He went to the library to study.

The employer increased salaries to improve morale.

3. Obsolete Phrases. Obsolete phrases are simply out-of-date phrases. They contribute to tiresome sentences. They increase sentence length. They come between you and the reader. Need any more reasons to get rid of them? The best way to figure out whether your phrasing is obsolete is to ask yourself, "Would I say it this way if I were talking to this person face to face?" If the answer is no, get out your red pen and find a better way to say it.

Obsolete

beg to state

as per your communication

hoping to hear from you

soon, we remain

in response to same

yours of the 12th

awaiting your reply, we are

in due course

permit me to say that

we are in receipt of

pursuant to

in closing, I'd like to say

accordance to our records

attach herewith is

kindly advice

this will acknowledge

contents duly noted

as stated above

Up-to-Date

(omit)

as in your e-mail/phone call/letter

(omit)

in response

your e-mail of June 12

(omit)

today; tomorrow (or a specific time and date)

(permission is not necessary; just say what you wish)

we have received

(omit)

(omit)

we find

here is

please let us know

thank you for

followed in every detail

as I have said

By getting rid of long, awkward phrases, you clear the way for better understanding between you and your reader-so be bold and let the red ink fly.