Unfortunately, we are so spring-loaded, when we network, Boom – as soon as someone asks us a question, we start telling them everything we possibly can about our product - why it's the best or why everyone wants it or why everyone should. That kind of reality must be overcome if you want to wake up and see the effect you have on people. You and only you can control if you attract or push people away.



You'll have no shortage of questions to ask people if you know you are looking for a friend, not a customer. The friend you want to find is someone who defines a great reality. Someone who is up to something. Someone who knows what they want. You can't attract someone like that without being someone like that. Then, when you find each other, you can teach each other how to be successful. You can encourage each other, too.

The other night my partner and I went out with our friend, Maurice. He said Albert Einstein defined genius as the way we handle the here and now. Wow. Double bonus. Not only do I like the way Maurice defines reality but I got corroboration and encouragement from dear old Uncle Albert, assuming he said that.

I am in love with loving the here and now. I love to think this is all an illusion, some quantum, mysterious, holographic dream. Remember that the next time someone defines reality in a negative way, and run. You're looking for the unstoppably optimistic, the causelessly happy, the self-generated silly, the undeniably young at heart who never stop playing and having fun because they love to think and define reality for themselves.

If we were together networking, I'd ask you what you think about defining reality. I'd listen so I could see if I like the way you define reality, so I could choose whether or not to keep talking to you. Let's face it, talking about our products is a waste of time if someone hasn't asked us about them. We're all connected. If you want to know about my products or services, you'll call or write.

And that, my dear friend, is the new way to network, the new way to market, the new way to sell. No one's a customer. We're all providers. We all have something to sell. We all have competition marketing similar stuff. The only thing left to set us apart is how we, as individuals, define reality, how we converse and interact as friends, how we love our friends and how our friends love us because they love the way we define reality. Define a great reality and you will attract plenty of people who want what you have – wonderful people who create wonderful realities for you. Now stop and picture business networking with some of this in mind.