You may have seen Oprah, Ellen or some other one name only talk show host discussing internet dating online. No doubt they have stressed the importance of making sure that you stay safe and secure. Some of the advice is general enough that it obviously applies to everyone. But the great preponderance of this advice is being aimed directly at women.

In many ways that is totally understandable. We all have heard the stories of online dating hookups that have gone tragically wrong. The incidents thankfully are few and far between but the overwhelming majority of victims have been women.

But basket cases are not confined to one gender. While online dating offers a wide variety of quality women to choose from, it also has it share of weirdos that you need to be on guard against.



1. Why do you need my mother's maiden name?

You meet a woman in one of those dating chat rooms who seems remarkably casual about giving out her personal information. She asks you to do the same. Not only does she want to know your real name but also your address, phone number and any other information she can get her hands on. Why? That is the first question you should be thinking. Until you feel more at ease about her, avoid giving out your personal information; and even then be very selective in what you give out. The chances are that if she is extremely anxious to know your personal information, than it is not to your advantage.

2. I think we just met

It has only been a short time and you two seem to be hitting it off pretty well; until she drops the M- word. You know it as marriage. Where did that come from you wonder? And it is not just some abstract discussion either. She really starts leaning on you to make a commitment. This may be a good time for you to log off and end all communication. Moving too fast could be a tell tale sign of some serious insecurity issues.

Or maybe instead of commitment, she drops another M-word. Money; as in give her some. Some women have a number of ways to get you to open your wallet and make you think it was your idea. The list of men who swore they knew better (just before they co-signed the loan) is endless. Remember you are not online to become anyone's sugar daddy.

3. Operator could you try that number again?

She gives you her phone number and says call her anytime. Great, except every time you call, you are unable to get in contact with her. If you do get in touch with her, it's always because you leave a message and she calls back. The warning bells in your head should be ringing loud and clear. Either she is stringing you along for reasons only known to her or there is somebody else in her life and she is not being straight with you. Whichever one it is, proceed with extreme caution.

There is no great mystery of why most online dating advice is aimed primarily at women and that is probably as it should be. But men must also practice the same degree of safety. Therefore follow the tips mentioned above combined with your good old fashioned gut instinct and stay safe.