If Mom is a sustained, lasting light, then Dad is a spark. It is certainly true in my family, where the men simply produce a different kind of energy. Dads and Grandpas are wonderfully familiar but, at the same time, exotic.



Some of my most vivid memories from childhood took place during weekend car rides, just my Dad and I. They are engraved in my memory not because we did anything particularly exciting or adventurous (these were mostly just weekly errands, with the occasional stop at a donut shop). And it was not the conversation; we did not do much talking at all. There was just something different about being with him.

It is that way in the family that I have created, too. For my daughters, Cassie and Callie, Daddy is an exclamation point at the end of each day.

I am certain that two year old Cassie does not know how to tell time, but at precisely 6:30 every weeknight, she has her nose pressed against the glass, waiting for the sound of that familiar truck to rumble up the driveway.

Callie, almost three months old, coos and grins at me all day, but when Dad comes home, her muscles really start to work. She starts making little jabs with her arms and legs. Her mouth forms an "o" shape. She is a picture of pure concentration.

When my daughter and I were living with my parents awaiting the birth of Callie, Grandpa would announce his arrival each evening with two quick honks. "Grandpa! Grandpa!" Cassie would run to the door so fast that her socks would send her sliding across the linoleum.

The wide eyed way Cassie looks at the men in her life just melts my heart. I can only imagine what it does to them. Like most toddlers, her whole face has a feeling, not just her mouth.

I wonder how things would change (with our husbands, our fathers, our mothers, our children, our friends) if we all greeted one another like this. If we carried this intensity into all of our relationships. If we ran so fast that we slid to greet the important people in our lives.

An Oprah episode a few years back had Toni Morrison asking, "Do your eyes light up when your children come into the room?" Because that is what they are looking for, Morrison said.

I find myself reflecting on that wisdom frequently. Because is that not what we are all looking for?

Today, let us make sure someone finds it.