Men are as variable as women when it comes to what they find attractive in the opposite sex. Some people are drawn to eyes first, some guys notice the way she moves or sense of adventure, while yet others could be attracted to fashion sense or a certain je ne sais quoi. It varies across the spectrum.



The upside is that on the question of personality, men are surprisingly similar. There are certain traits that men find attractive. For the most part, these can be reduced down to five important qualities guys seek in a woman.

1. Autonomy – Clingy people are a real turn off. Being independent and pursuing your own agenda not only demonstrates that you are a one of a kind, energetic woman, it also indicates that you are confident enough to hang out by yourself for periods of time, and gives himthat much needed and often-talked-about “space". It is wonderful to feel loved, but too much of a good thing can feel like suffocation. Having external pastimes and passions is vital – and also gives your guy occasion to miss you while you’re away!

2. Self Assurance – Research shows that the most attractive trait in both gender is confidence. When you are happy with yourself, it shows other people that there is something to be happy about, that you’re living a full and happy life. A little jealousy is natural and can even be attractive, but a constantly whining, self doubting girl, who always questions your wherabouts and motives is deeply unattractive. Be self assured and take him at face value. If he cheats, it’s his loss, you’ll dump him for someone better.

3. Be Calm – A woman worked up is a guy’s worst nightmare. From his nagging mom to his annoying ex, your partner has probably witnessed a whole lot of female freak outs. These occurrences are disturbing for men, who steer clear of them at all costs. Be open, calm, and rational at all times, and the friendship and respect between you will progress. If you are consistently agitated or irrational, your man will avoid you, especially when he probably needs you most. Be a reliable support, in a composed, understanding and reasonable way.

4. Don’t Be A Nag – Let it go! Pick your fights, and choose them thoughtfully. Like everyone, men can be somewhat strong headed or ridiculous sometimes. You should learn when defend your position and when to let it slide. Pestering rarely solves the problem, most often prevents a resolution, and generally ends up evoking resentment.

5. Tolerance (for his interests, his mom, his buddies, etc.) – This can be a deal breaker. There must be respect in any relationship, and it has to go both ways. So take time to understand opinions, give full support and never belittle in any way, shape, or form particularly in public or in front of friends and family. If this isn’t really you, sometimes you just have to agree to disagree. You might not appreciate all his behaviours, or certain elements of his life, and you don’t need to – however you should respect them.