The task nobody wants to do - write and deliver a eulogy. Examples of eulogies may be of some assistance. What you effectively have to do is to talk about the deceased to other people. Does this make you nervous? You may think you are emotionally not up to this, and so examples of eulogies you can get ideas from would help greatly.



Before entering panic mode, first of all take a deep breath, try to relax a little, and think for a moment that you are trying to accomplish many things all rolled into one. So each one needs to be addressed individually. This is something you really want to do a good job of, so lets look at what needs to happen and how to go about it.

It is a responsibility you have been given, so you know you need to do this right - no matter how impossible it seems at the moment. You know you can't just copy examples of eulogies with a word changed here and there - you want this to be just right, so the person deceased would be proud of you. Every word you say will go home with everyone listening to you, so you want it to be personal.

The time required to prepare a eulogy and deliver it will vary from one person to the next. However as a general rule, it might take you hours and hours to research if necessary, depending on how well you knew the person, and how much more information you want or need from others. You may need to seek information from others about the following:

1. Stories from other family members

2. Friend's memories

3. Stories from co-workers or employers

4. Stories from neighbours

5. Memories and stories from other associates

This process can be enjoyable as you may learn things about the deceased that you never ever knew.

While it's easy to get examples of eulogies and just reword them for your own use, would it not feel better to have the skill to write and deliver a very personal eulogy - both as a sign of respect for the deceased and for your listeners who are relying on you?

Aquiring such skill is not as hard as you think. It's amazing what we can do when we put our heart and soul into it. So lets see how easy it can be once you actually get started.

After all your research is complete, either sit down at your computer, or get a pen and paper and lets get started on the next step. You need to note in point form only what you are planning to talk about. Your points should be very simple eg a town or suburb name, persons name, teenaged years, life accomplishment, social things, other memories and so on. Remember only a couple of word point form for now.

Next look back at your list, and place each point in order as you think they should go eg childhood events would come before adult accomplishments etc. It doesn't have to be perfect, just a rough order. Remember at this point you are doing great to get this far. You are doing the right thing by doing this properly, rather than just copying examples of eulogies from other people.

Nearly there - keep going. The next thing to do is to expand on the points you have made. It does not have to be spectacular writing, just in your own words, and just what you need to say to explain the point or the story. You should read the sentences out loud as you write - pretend your cupboard is a person, and read it out loud to your cupboard. If it just didn't sound right, say it again the right sounding way, and rewrite your sentence.

After the first few, it will feel much easier. It will begin to flow. Once you have done this with all the sentences and points, go back to the beginning - even though you do not have an introduction or a conclusion, read the whole thing out loud from beginning to end. There may be a couple more changes to make.

The introduction is the next thing to tackle. You could mention some of the things you will miss about the person, incorporating a short story or memory, comment or statement using the person's name.

Then you are only left with the conclusion. This usually consists of any other thoughts you have, Sometimes a poem can be used here, or a personal prayer or blessing.

Lastly, simply read it again from start to finish, listening for any last minute changes you want to make. Maybe you could get a friend to listen to it if you would like another opinion. Another option is to record you reading the eulogy. Play it back to yourself. You can listen for yourself then. At this point you need a great big congratulations - you did not take the easy road and copy something from examples of eulogies - instead you did the right thing by the deceased and for everyone listening.

This is an opportunity for you that you will never get back again, so as a few last comments, remember grammer is not important, but your personalized message is. Express the feelings you have and don't be afraid of emotion. You are there for these reasons, as a tribute to the person and their life.