Soul Mate Test: NO is about boundaries and identification.



You have to know who you are if you want to find someone to be perfect for you. By and large many of us have a real and important need to become clear about things we would like. This applies to everything, from everyday practical matters to dealing with distressing emotions. The mystery seems to be to do with how to reach clarity and then to find the solutions to questions. The 7 Words System offers a straightforward insightful routine that allows us to get hold of a greatly improved appreciation of what it is that we are trying to find. This kicks off with No. We need firstly to identify exactly what we do not want what is not useful, before we can know what we do want.

Soul Mate Test: HELLO is about openness and exchange.

Look around and see what's happening, to you, to others...learn what works for others and think about it carefully. The next phase correlates with the word Hello. We will need to make ourselves open to new possibilities if we have a desire to expand our array of answers to questions arising. Is that reasonably logical? To get something new we will need to broaden our sphere of awareness and look where we have not previously looked previously. New ideas, new contacts , new situations and new things are clearly facets of giving awareness to something we have not previously experienced. It requires that we replace old for new, that can tender something in fair return for what we want to obtain for ourselves.

Soul Mate Test: THANK YOU is about appreciating and valuing.

How well are you expressing your appreciation? Can you find qualities to admire in people you meet; the best qualities are usually deeper, often hidden. Between all existing choices, some are more desirable than others and we feel we want to treat them as having a greater worth, because we appreciate them more. This is explained by the primary word Thanks. So often, we forget the significance of what we have, then blindly move into ingratitude and are likely to assume what should not be assumed. It's more than just politeness to let somebody see our appreciation for things we regard as valuable; it has a significant part to play in helping us to realize our targets. Psychologically we are attracted to what we pronounce gratefulness for, and yet it's equally valid to say that we can to magnetize them to us too. We build up our magnetism when we say Thanks and therefore, when we do so, we readily bring things to us.

Soul Mate Test: GOODBYE is about realization, decision, completion, and moving on.

Are you willing to realize that after finding a soul mate life has changed and will be forever different. Are you willing to change? The word Goodbye is the fourth of the 7 primary words and relates to a course of development that has 4 clearly defined steps. They are: realization, decision, completion and moving on. Goodbye is being said to a particular stage of development, which can be understood plainly as utter refutation of a viable course of action that we had been stepping towards and in future will not pursue. It is a crossroad point in our selection of possible futures. Goodbye is different from No in that it is clear that there has been a degree of involvement already, which now needs to end compared to No's rejection in the first place. True decisions cut the past away unequivocally and that penetrating quality gives rise to an opportunity that otherwise does not materialize.

Soul Mate Test: PLEASE is about intention and cooperation.

How do you cooperate to find harmony? You do have a vision of a successful partnership? The future opens out according to the habits of what has gone before unless we take control of it and shape it to our needs. This obliges us to have a vision of how we want it to be; this vision has to be very clear, particular and positive converted into intention. They differ don't they - vision and intention? The first is a bit illusory and the second is much more directed and controlled. For a vision to become real there must be cooperation. Nothing can be completed without earning the help of other people - this takes expertise, most likely arguments, even stimulation. It is not always necessary to proffer something such as money or money's worth

Soul Mate Test: SORRY is about responsibility and repair.

Do you need to take responsibility and feel genuine remorse for your part in any conflicts and tensions that exist? Sorry, the sixth word, is best seen as repairing damage done whenever we've been thoughtless or heedless to the needs or wants of someone else. The best strategy is to make sure we prevent the need to say it by being thoughtful in advance. Why on earth should we? Well it's because anyone we upset could easily be inclined to act against our better purposes and lessen our chances of success, so it is simply more prudent to take into account others as well as ourselves. It is all to do with being responsible, having a degree of concern for someone whom we've upset and making penance when we've done wrong. Only then is it possible to prevent or repair bitterness and leave go of the permanent unpleasantness that otherwise would develop and continually irritate.

Soul Mate Test: YES is about accepting and surrender.

Sometimes unacceptable behaviour just has to be accepted. How tolerant are you? The concluding stage of our 7 Words model relates with acceptance; there are instances when we simply have to tolerate what we cannot change. The word is Yes. It would be fine wouldn't it if we were able to make the world exactly the way we envision it - but in truth we can't. We always need to abide what comes, and to take what is not exactly what we asked for.

The greatest secret is to trust that everything in the long run turns around to our advantage, that the modifications to our plans are all improvements when comprehended in the perspective of the longer term. Clearly it's not easy to see it when we are still close and attached to our desires of course not! However pause a while and you will see that the unanticipated incidents, the surprises and disappointments are actually the best bits disguised as hardship

James Burgess 2008