Dating is a source of recreation, and it is important to always keeping mind that it is also another way of getting to know and meet more people. This will make it less intimidating in going up to a woman and talking to her, if you tell yourself that it is pretty much the same as initiating a conversation with a stranger: scary, but not extremely so.

Men all over the world try endlessly to strike upon the right technique or pick up line, all to secure that first date, and then the subsequent and elusive second date. No technique or pick up line is going to work for you, if you lack self confidence. Women look for a man with value, who can contribute to a relationship. If you lack confidence, however, fret not. Below are 4 powerful steps to gaining confidence with women.

Step 1: Online Dating

Yes, laugh if you want. It is a fallacy that online dating is only for the old or the desperate, but this is not true. It is a great meeting ground for getting to know other people first, before deciding if it is someone you would like to meet in real life. It also gives you the opportunity to let the real you shine through, especially if you tend to seize up upon being in the presence of women. This should give you an indication of what dating is like face to face, it should be about getting to know the other person better, and not about using techniques to secure a second date.

Step 2: Your Personality

No one likes to hear someone spend the entire evening whining about the bitch at work, or how they deserved a promotion more than so-and-so. Similarly, keep the negativity away from your date: it is a sure conversation killer, and you can be assured that your date will never want to see you again. Be positive, and allow your personality to shine through. That is the major determinant on whether you will make it to a second date. Being positive and smiling will also help you to act more confident than you actually are, and confidence is a big draw for women.

Step 3: Location

Suggest a neutral location that your date will feel comfortable in. Pick somewhere central with people, so that she does not feel intimidated or threatened. However, do not go overboard and pick an overly crowded location. This will limit the conversation and the noise levels and crowd will reduce the interaction and opportunities for you to get to know each other. Plan out an activity that you think she will enjoy, such as going to the drive-in movies, or a board game caf? where you can spend quality time with privacy for conversation, without it being too threatening for her.

Step 4: The Bill

Always pay for the bill. Going Dutch is not an option on the first date, simply because manners dictate that the guy should pay for the dinner, or the movies. Paying for the bill without hesitation will also make your date feel like she is being treated like a princess, and that you value her company. It is also a subtle signal that you are a stable person who is capable of treating a woman right.

Follow these 4 simple steps to gaining confidence with women. Remember, it is not about tricks and techniques, it is about holding your nervousness at bay to allow the real you to establish a connection or rapport with your date.