Have you committed any of the ten break up blunders?

1. Telling your ex what a huge mistake they are making. This won't cause them to pause and think it over, instead they will think of what a mistake it was to get involved with you in the first place.

3. Calling too soon after the break up. Your ex has decided to break up with you and it should be clear enough that they need their space right now and the last thing they want is to hear from you.

3. Drunk Dialing. That fourth glass of wine or beer has completely impaired your judgment so you keep picking up the phone and try and get your ex to talk to you.... See #2

4. Leaving your ex a lot of voice mail and email messages... Again - see #2

5. Telling your ex and everyone who will listen how sad, lonely and depressed you have been since the breakup. If you are hoping to win the sympathy of your ex you need to understand that this is just being manipulative, and no matter how unintentional it may be you are still overwhelming them with your emotions and neediness, a real relationship killer.

6. Continuing to argue about the breakup and bring up past disagreements and misunderstandings. Perhaps you do get your ex's attention and get them to talk to you. Is this the best use of your precious contact time? It really is being fairly petty and immature and really isn't going to get you where you want to go. It only keeps you stuck in the past instead.

7. Professing your undying love over and over. Even if you think that your ex doesn't understand how much your really love them, that's obviously not the issue at the moment or they wouldn't have wanted to leave. It's time to take a different approach and start analyzing what went wrong with the relationship and what you need to change instead of believing that true love conquers all.

8. Apologizing over and over and over again. Now maybe you did something wrong, perhaps even really blew it by cheating or breaking a big promise. An apology is in order, but you have to know the right way to make an effective apology and rarely anyone knows how to do this. You also don't want to make the mistake of apologizing too soon. And if you didn't do something that warrants an apology, then you are compromising yourself and this isn't an attractive trait in anybody.

9. Trying to make your ex jealous. Well, this may work initially for some psychological reasons, and maybe a little bit won't hurt as people tend to want what they can't have. But it still won't change the reasons for the break up in the first place and if all you are depending on is manipulative tactics to try and win your ex back you will end up with a pretty twisted relationship that will be even harder to keep going for the long term.

10. Pleading with your ex to take you back. The big secret here is this: people like people who like themselves, who are strong and emotionally secure enough not to want someone back so much that they will sacrifice their self dignity by begging.

Now you know the common blunders to avoid if you are serious about wanting to win back your ex girlfriend, boyfriend, wife or husband. So start analyzing where the relationship went wrong and what needs to change and then being planning a SMARTER strategy to get your ex back.