We all have them. Whether it's minor or life-changing, everyone has bad habits they could do without. Some might come with physical addictions, while others are simple social habits which make us look foolish or tick people off. Some bad habits might have long term health effects. Whether you bite your nails or yell at your children, there are certain ways to help yourself face your bad habits and try to mend your ways. Before self-improvement happens, you have to focus on your actions. Figure out the costs of your bad habits and the reasons you started the habit in the first place. Self-analysis helps you begin to cope when you are faced with the habit the next time. Once you know why the bad habit is a part of your life, you can start to deal with the habit itself.
Keep a journal of your habit
This forces you to face your actions every day. Every time your habitual behavior "takes over", you'll have a record of it and force yourself to remember. Note what your thoughts and emotions were as you were involved in the habit. This allows analysis of why you are performing this habit. This kind of self-evaluation is healthy for you.
Ask yourself why you enjoy the habit or why you started it in the first place
Analyse the thought process which started the habit. Were you looking for acceptance from your peers? Was it an escape from some life condition? Whatever the case, once you start to reason out your actions, you'll probably find those actions don't make logical sense. This will prepare you to change your behavior.
Focus on the negative repercussions of your habit
Write these down if it helps you. What is your bad habit costing you? Once your start to understand that you are losing out on many things do to this bad habit, this will motivate you to modify your behavior.
Understand the obvious benefits of dropping your habit
There are always alternatives, and curtailing one action gives you more time for other ones. Think about what you could be doing instead of your bad habit. Figure out positive ways to meet the same needs which were originally filled by your bad habit. Then start to practice these new habits.
Focus on your behavior
Figure out how serious you are about changing the habit. Do you want to avoid the negatives of the habit or do you want to continue the habit?
Practice discipline in the moment
It's easy to tell yourself you can change your bad habit. This doesn't matter much if you wilt in the moment of truth. A lot of bad habits have to do with instant gratification. You know that some action isn't good for you in the big picture or in the long term, but you want to live in the moment. You want to gratify your momentary needs. It's hard to stay disciplined, because giving into your impulses is just so easy. Most of the time, it's pleasurable. But when you start to perform some action you know is bad for you, you have to catch yourself. Nobody else will.
Getting rid of a bad habit is learning good habits
You'll probably replace your bad actions with something else. This may take a little getting used to, but your new life will eventually become comfortable to you and feel right. Remember to practice patience with yourself. If you fall back into the old habit, don't kick yourself around for it. Don't fall into self-pity and decide you can't beat the habit. Just get back to your healthy behavior. One time doesn't have to turn into two and three and then a habit.
Don't be afraid to ask for support from friends, family or fellow sufferers
We are social creatures. People coping with the consequences of their actions draw strength from each other. It isn't a weakness to ask for help or simply to vent about how difficult your self-improvement is. Get comfortable talking about the habit. When you talk to others, they might be able to provide advice or encouragement that you normally wouldn't get from yourself.
One final note on this subject. If your bad habit has an addictive quality to it, this is going to be a lot harder. You might need professional help, because an addiction has a medical component to it.
How To Break Bad Habits
Having just looked at a list of bad habits posted on the internet, I can honestly say that whilst they are habitual repetitive behaviours, many of them are also disgusting! One site listed nail biting, throat clearing, lying, interrupting, chewing the end of a pen, smoking and swearing in its top 20 list of bad habits. And that’s not to mention knuckle cracking and thumb sucking.
Habits are formed when a behaviour is consistently repeated. Eventually, it becomes an unconscious behaviour, that is, that you can do it without thinking about it. In just the way your unconscious controls you blinking, breathing and walking without you having to remember to make it happen, it also takes over responsibility for activating the habit.
In a sense, the levels of competency goes some way to explaining how this unconscious activity is created:
Unconscious Incompetence- Not knowing about it and not doing it. (Ignorant)
Conscious Incompetence- Knowing what needs to be done but unable to do it, lack of skill required.
Conscious Competence- Knowing what needs to be done and have to think about how to do it, in order to do it.
Unconscious Competence- Knowing what you need to do, and being able to do it without consciously thinking about how it is done.
We can see by looking at the levels of competency process, how a positive behaviour such as learning to drive for example, is taken through the above stages so that it shifts from a conscious activity, into an unconscious one. The problem with this process is that the unconscious mind will not distinguish between a good habit, and a bad one. When learning to drive, this is generally a beneficial habit to master, and biting your nails for example is not. However the unconscious simply responds to the programming it is given. It does make a distinction about whether it is right for you or not. The more times you repeat the behaviour, the more hard wired the behaviour becomes, good or bad.
This means that in order to break a bad habit, the automatic function of it, needs to be bought back into the awareness of the conscious mind, in order to give the conscious a choice about whether to continue with the action. This could be enough for some to break their pattern, yet for other, even though when they are conscious of the habit, may continue to pursue it. For example, many people who smoke and know that they should give up, are aware of the cigarettes they light up and inhale. Worse than that, they are even conscious of what they are doing to their depleting immune system as they do it- and still they continue- why?!
The answer is that they get some sort of a pay off. An opportunity to be destructive and release some tension by biting your nails, or a moment to drift off and take a break from the busyness of work when having a fag. In the great scheme of things it’s important to note that these payoffs are of course only temporary. They only alleviate pressures for a short amount of time and usually come with a down side, such as ultimately damaging your health, the way you look, the way you feel, or the way people respond to you.
NLP techniques are great for helping to get “leverage” for applying pain to the unwanted problem and pleasure to the solution. Anchoring techniques can provide an instant desired state to relieve tension for example, so that it is no longer achieved from performing the habit. A Hypnotherapist can be consulted to reprogram the unconscious part of the mind, linking unsavoury feelings to the unwanted behaviour (for example feeling sick if you go to put your fingers in your mouth to bite your nails) and forming new habits to deal with stressful/ boredom situations in a new empowering way.
A Hypnotherapist in Hertfordshire can help you to achieve a state of well being and to be rid of bad habits. Hypnosis works because of the clients ability to focus on the hypnotherapists voice. Hertfordshire Hypnosis teaches hypnotherapists how to use their voices to create the best level of trance possible.
Both Ada Denis & Gemma Bailey are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.