I spent some time with a client last week who talked of his fears for the state of his business, how he was afraid of what others would think of him if his business collapsed and how he was afraid of where is marriage was going as a result. Although he believed his problems to be unique, the conversation reminded me of many that I have had over the recent past. It reminded me of the proliferation of media commentaries at present that "markets are gripped by fear", people are "fearful for their jobs" and that people are "afraid they will lose their homes".
All these problems are, indeed, real problems. However, it is one thing to experience such difficulties and entirely different thing to be consumed by them, fearful of them or feel in some way victimised by them. And, although the author, Susan Jeffers has, for many years now, suggested that you "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway!", you and I need to be fully mindful of the fact - the scientific fact, that fear is not real. Fear is a useless thought. Fear, like beauty, is in the mind of the beholder! Thoughts like "fear" disable us from taking action - so that we end up reacting and making matters worse.
Many years back, during a two-day workshop, one of my now longstanding clients took exception to my saying that I had a problem with his statement that "after my Dad's business failed, we had to sell our house and move into a rented flat. We couldn't even afford heating oil that winter and we were all freezing and I was so upset that we were all freezing". In a recent conversation with the same guy, he understood what I had been saying many years previously. Sure, he was freezing - a statement of fact. But acknowledging the fact and then feeling sorry for himself, wallowing in it, victim-like, are two completely different things. The "victim mindset" disabled his ability to pick himself up, dust himself off and do his very best in the face of undoubted adversity.
Again, clients have said to me that it's all very well for me, living comfortably high in the French Alps, to suggest that we shouldn't react to bad things happening, we shouldn't be afraid of what might happen or shouldn't fear the consequences of actions we really need to take. But let me point out that I've been there, done that, got the T-shirt! A few years back, with a wife and three young children, after we'd been done over by some unscrupulous "investors", we found ourselves with €18.58 in the bank with no immediate source of income. Whilst the temptation would have been to react and go into a self-induced decline, feeling sorry for ourselves was not an option and would only have made a desperate situation a whole lot worse.
We all have a choice in life - moment to moment - whether we will react like a so-called normal person, a moronic rabbit caught in the headlights - or whether we will take real action, dealing with the situation in which we find ourselves, regardless of how desperate it might actually be.
Fear - a useless reaction to the ups and downs of live - paralyses people. If you are afraid, you have lost control of your mind. Your mind is controlling you. Eighty years of research proves that, when we allow our minds to control us, we are unable to pay attention to the reality of the moment, unable to notice the potential for opportunity and completely unable to act appropriately. The same research also confirms that the average adult has 50,000 random thoughts each day, most of them useless, some of them, like "fear", toxic.
The only way we can take appropriate action in the face of adversity is to calm our minds and come to our senses. You have five sense, you need to use them to enable you fully understand and experience what's going on in the present moment. In that calm state of mind, you can take appropriate action and, as a result, even out of adversity, create the kind of effortless success that you really, really want. This is not some kind of positive thinking crap that I'm peddling. The research that I mentioned earlier has proved that our subconscious minds create our version of so-called "reality". Dwell on useless thoughts and that concoction of "reality" will become very real for you.
The very real alternative is to harness your subconscious mind - so that you control it, not the other way around. In doing so, regardless of whatever you might currently fear, you will overcome. You will change everything, straight away. You will be able to create the life that you really want.
Copyright (c) 2009 Willie Horton
How To Deal With Stress And Anxiety
Stress can be defined as a state we experience when there is a mismatch between perceived demands and our perceived ability to cope. Stress can also be defined as an adaptive response by a body to change in the environment. Stress response evolved to enable humans to deal with life-threatening dangers or stressors such as being confronted with a wild animal or perhaps a hostile human. Situations like this required action ? the activation of stress response to wither stay and fight or to run away.
Today we hopefully won't have to face the same dangers as our ancestors but the stress response to demanding situations we face is still with us and our mind and body still prepare for fight or flight when confronted with this equivalent of the wild animal. This is where the problem may begin as activation of the fight or flight response with no physical outlet, such as if we are stuck in a traffic jam and can't fight it or flee it, or maybe an unfair confrontation in the workplace where once again the response for action may be triggered but we cant vent it by fighting or running away without consequences we would rather avoid. Perhaps both of these events and more are experienced on the same day, perhaps every day, and the stress builds within us until it can damage our health if a solution is not found
Stress isn't always bad ? the stress response was designed to help and protect us and some people even place themselves in stressful situations they know they can handle for excitement and ?the rush? as it is often called.
We all experience stress in different ways depending upon our personality type, conditioning and possible training also.
When we face a stressor but perceive we have the ability to deal with it successfully a feeling of success and achievement can be gained. Getting the balance right between good stress to motivate us and encourage us to grow, and our ability to cope with the stress is possibly the key to remaining healthy, positive and active in whatever arena of life we find ourselves.
Our ability to cope with stress can be affected by our diet and the intake of good substances that out body needs to remain strong and flexible and to repair itself when needed. Also we should avoid anything that could cause us to be more stressed or weaker such as drugs, alcohol, smoking etc.
Finally, stress can be external, some event or situation that is causing stress, or internal, attitudes or emotions that lead to stress (anxiety, guilt, low self esteem, fear, etc).
What is the Fight/Flight Response? Why do we still have it?
The ?Fight or Flight Response? is a physiological reaction and is the body's response to a stressor.
Changes in hormones prepare a person to either stay and deal with a stressor or to take flight/run away. This immediate state of alarm is when the body prepares to take action, and in this state a person will be extremely alert to their surroundings but also very anxious and possibly unable to concentrate.
The body will slow down systems not vital in responding to the stressor, such as the digestive system, which is why a person in a fight or flight situation may have a dry mouth and a nervous/upset stomach. The body will make other preparations such as improved cooling for the body as more energy is used and this will result in perspiration.
The fight or flight response is a very old and very basic response and has been with us for a very long time. It was originally a response to danger that would prepare our ancestors to fight the wild beast or the enemy who might suddenly threaten or confront them, or to take flight and literally run away from the danger.
This response is triggered when we send a message of alarm to a part of the brain called the hypothalamus. This area of the brain will then send a signal to the glands to release adrenaline, cortisol and endorphin into the blood stream. Increased levels of adrenaline increase heart rate and blood flow which in turn brings extra oxygen and glucose to the muscles. Cortisol causes an increase in amino-acids and sugars in the blood. Amino-acids are crucial for the repair and recovery of damaged tissues which may occur under stress and the blood sugar adds to the availability of glucose (fuel) for the body.
The release of endorphin, which is a morphine like substance only more powerful, provides the body's natural tranquilizing system. Pain is blocked and a feeling of euphoria may be experienced, both helping to get the body through the situation it may find itself in due to stress.
We still have this response, as it is still necessary to prepare and protect us in times of alarm, such as being involved in an emergency situation of any kind, or being confronted with any form of potentially life threatening danger.
Once the initial stages of this fight or flight response are over, a person will have a psychological reaction to the stressor which will be based upon many variables including, personality type, conditioning, age, physical and mental ability, and their knowledge relevant to the situation to be dealt with.
It is very often the resulting symptoms of this fight or flight response kicking in that we tend to call a panic attack. what actually happens is that we may be in a situation where we can't fight or flight, such as a meeting or on a train, and so we become more and more anxious and may feel as though we will pass out, or be sick, or any one of a number of responses. What often happens then,is we find we have a desperate need to urinate, and that is another way the subconscious mind will sometimes attempt to gain our attention and force us to leave the arena in which we find ourselves at the time. It is normally the feeling of not being able to escape, and knowing that we might have this strong feeling to fight or flight that causes much of the anxiety and expectation of problems for most people who find they need help to overcome their problem.
Also, many people?.no?that should be most people who suffer from panic attacks and anxiety will normally have the need for some Obsessive compulsive actions in their life'it can often be a type of coping, or controlling strategy.
Why hypnotherapy is totally different from any other form of therapy?
Hypnotherapy is different from any other form of therapy because of the way in which the therapy part happens while one is in hypnosis. Put another way, hypnotherapy is a very effective combination of hypnosis, a trance or altered state of mind and deep relaxation, and the chosen therapy, which might be for example; suggestion therapy, regression, ego states therapy, neuro-linguistic-programming or hypnoanalysis.
Hypnosis allows an individual to enter a state of deep relaxation which in itself is a very useful therapy for combating stress. It also allows one to become calm and focused, as all parts of the mind work together and concentrate on solving the problem at hand, and therefore making the very best use of the chosen therapy as it is applied.
Why it is so helpful in cases of stress, anxiety and panic attacks?
Hypnosis is a state in which the conscious critical faculty is temporarily suspended or distracted and in which all parts of the mind work in harmony for the good of the whole being.
When in hypnosis an individual can become very relaxed and at the same time very aware and ?sharp?, mentally focused.
For the computer literate, I would liken hypnosis to the ?safe mode? on a computer, where if a part of the system is acting up or malfunctioning, placing the system in safe mode allows for investigation and repair to be carried out safely while minimising the risk to the normal operating systems. In some sports it would be like a ?time-out?, where all parts of the team come together briefly to review the current state of play, to identify where poor choices may have affected the outcomes and to choose a new strategy to move forward with.
In the normal hurly burly of life we seldom have time to take a time out, or to go into safe mode to pull together our resources and to calmly take stock and plan our best way forward. Hypnosis then, is a safe, relaxing state in which we can let go the tensions in and around us for a short period, and in which, if we desire it, a skilled therapist can guide us through the stages of investigation, discovery, planning and repair we may need.
Hypnotherapy therefore provides relaxation (and clients of good therapists learn self-hypnosis so they can find this deep relaxation for themselves) and is therefore useful at even this basic level, as a kind of first aid. The good therapist will help the client to find any repressed emotions, triggers and false instincts from the past that are a kind of out-of-date, erroneous, or maybe just no longer wanted or needed programming, that loops around once triggered to cause us much anxiety and feelings of panic, but we often don't know why. Following this, the wonderful power of hypnotic suggestion, and Neuro-Linguistic programming techniques will be used to provide new and efficient programming to support moves forward into a much more positive life with a better outlook on everything..
Both Willie Horton & Alan Crisp are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Willie Horton has sinced written about articles on various topics from self improvement and motivation, Cure Anxiety and self improvement and motivation. Willie Horton was born and educated in Dublin, Ireland. An ex-Accountant and ex-Banker, he has worked with business leaders for thirteen years, enabling them understand how their state of mind creates their lives. Clients describe the results as 'unbeliev. Willie Horton's top article generates over 27100 views. to your Favourites.
Alan Crisp has sinced written about articles on various topics from Depression, Lose Weight and Cure Anxiety. Alan Crisp DHP, is a Clinical Hypnotherapist and Psychotherapist has been involved on training and people development for over 20 years and has a full time practice on Beckenham on the borders of Kent and South East London. 020 8658 4290 alancrisp@hypnose. Alan Crisp's top article generates over 14800 views. to your Favourites.
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