Don't you hate being tongue-tied? It happens to everybody. You go up and say hi, maybe buy her a drink, and then you just stand there frozen. You stutter, ask what her job is, and basically bore her to death until she awkwardly excuses herself. The good news is you're about to find out three things you can do to always have something on the tip of your tongue to say to a woman.



1) Enter the "Now"

Most of the time, when you're stuck and lost for words, your mind isn't too empty. Usually it's too full. You might be ruminating about the past, or worrying about the future, even rambling about how this girl doesn't like you and might leave.

To get in the present moment, it's helpful to take twenty minutes out of each day and meditate. Some important books to check out are "The Power of Now" and "Stillness Speaks" (much shorter book), by Eckhart Tolle. Yoga also is extremely helpful in this area.

2) Master Free-Association

Conversational vibing is all about spontaneously relating to both your environment and to what someone with you has just said. It's always triggered by something that is around. For example, if a woman says she just got promoted, you may think of someone you know that got demoted over something silly. Or, you might think of a boxing "promotion" you saw on TV. Both are legitimate things to talk about.

To get better at free-associating it, just practice it! On your way to a social event, look around and come up with associations for things you pass by. If you see a white car, you can think "driving fast, long traffic lights, speeding ticket, white cars getting dirty fast." Maybe you'll see a McDonald's and think "fast food, Super Size Me, obesity, french fries, good food when you're drunk," and so on.

3) Keep up to date with things you find interesting.

If you have a topic you're very passionate about, you can talk about it endlessly. Once, I discovered this site that counts your calories based on what restaurant you went to. I was so amazed with it I told everyone. You have to find things that intrigue you and make you want to share what you learned. Avoid anything that might cause discomfort, such as religion, violent crime, or politics.

If you're truly interested in what you have to say, she'll be interested in it too. I can be a geek and talk about Guitar Hero for X-Box and women will giggle and love it. Health and science news excite a lot of people too. One great source of news tidbits is the magazine "The Week," not including the political stories, of course.

As you may have noticed, all these strategies require preparation before you actually meet the woman you're interested in. So get started now! Getting in the "now," free associating, and reading are things you can be doing consistently throughout the day, so it will be very easy to have flowing conversations when you want to. Keep track of your success!