Not everyday is peaceful and quiet and you can hear birds chirping outside the window and everyone is smiling. In reality there are kids screaming at each other, fighting, running through the house, slamming doors and eventually, running around you hoping you can solve the problem that is being argued.



It seems as though kids can fight over anything, it doesn't matter what age they are. If you have preschoolers, children, or teens you know how everything can turn into a fight; who opens the door, who gets the bathroom first, who will help with chores, who uses the desk to do their homework first, and of course there is the fight about who sits in the front seat of the van. But the best thing about all the fighting is that it is normal. Kids will fight because they struggle for your attention, they struggle to gain control and they struggle to get ahead. Competition is good and for that reason, parents need to allow some fighting to take place. But when does sibling rivalry become too much?

Like everything else, kids need a controlled environment when it comes to sibling rivalry as well. Allowing them to argue is normal but letting them duke it out in the back yard is not normal. Sibling rivalry can teach the child how to stand up for themselves without getting run over. It also gives them higher self esteem as well. It also teaches them how to handle relationships with everyone. Because sibling rivalry can get out of hand, a parent needs to intervene sometimes to stop them from fighting. Here are a few things to keep in mind if siblings are fighting in your house:

* Allow them a certain amount of time to say their peace before you get involved. A lot of times one will walk away and the problem is solved. If not and they begin to push and shove you need to step in. Also step in if foul language is being used.

* If one of the siblings has a friend over the fighting may get worse. The odds may shift and it becomes two against one. You may need to set some rules when friends come over that states siblings need to get along when guests are there or they will have to leave.

Because siblings are constantly in competition it may be a good idea to spend time with each one of your children in order to avoid more confrontations. If they feel that they are getting the same amount of attention from you they won't have any reason to fight and argue about that. Remember that some sibling rivalry is normal but you are in charge of how far it goes. Allow them to argue or disagree but not to the point that someone gets hurt. Don't allow your kids to ever leave anything unsettled. It will harbor bad feelings that will grow into anger. They need to be able to settle everything as it happens and that will be the approach that they take in life.