My sister has never forgiven me for telling her the truth about Santa Claus. She was only in kindergarten when I broke the news, taking away the myth of the jolly old elf who delivered Christmas presents every Christmas and replacing it with the harsh reality that Santa is no more magical than our parents and reindeer can’t really fly. I thought I was sharing a exciting secret. She thought I was taking away the magic of Christmas.



I don't remember her reaction, but she remembers it quite clearly. She was devastated and cried. And now, more than three decades later, she still likes to remind me of how I destroyed her childhood innocence. It's become a joke between us, one of those enduring childhood tales that gets retold at family gatherings whenever my sister wants to tease me, but now that we both have children, I realize just how young she was when I broke the spell and just what I took from her that day.

My daughter is three and my son is eight right now, so Santa's magic is still alive and well at our home. My son has starting making comments that indicate he might be starting to question Santa's existence, but he still believes. I’m glad. I’m sure that someday much too soon someone will let him in on the great charade and he'll come to us to ask the dreaded question: Is Santa real?

What will I say?

I know that sometimes the best way to answer to sensitive questions is another question: What do YOU think? Often kids don't want or need a big explanation. A simple answer is sometimes all that's required. It reminds me of the joke about the boy who asked his mom where he came from and she lectured him about the birds and the bees. When she finished he said, "But where did I come from? My friend Johnny is from Chicago."

So my first response will be to ask what he thinks. If he's not ready to let go of the magic, I will let him continue to believe. But if he's noticed that all those shopping mall Santas don’t look alike and realized it’s impossible to fly around the earth in a single evening, then I’ll tell him the truth.

Is Santa real? No, he’s not real in the way that he’s depicted in cartoons and marketing campaigns and images of him flying through the sky with magic reindeer. But he is real in many other ways, and those are the ones that count. That’s why I still believe in Santa. The spirit of giving that lives on in Santa comes from a very real man named Saint Nicholas, a generous person who donated his fortune to the poor and devoted his life to helping people, particularly children. His compassion and generosity set a shining example for people around the world who have translated his good deeds into the legend of Santa Claus.

I know we receive gifts when we do our best and are kind to others. These are traits Santa Claus rewards with inclusion on his Nice list. But we don't need have to wait to get on Santa's list to practice these traits. We simply need to remember that we’ll be rewarded every day for behaving in ways Santa would approve. The rewards may not come in boxes, bags, or bows, but they will come in the form of love, happiness, joy and friendship.

I also believe in the magic of Santa’s spirit. I believe life is magical, miraculous and mysterious, just like Santa, but only to those who are willing to believe. In our small world that is also full of hunger, hatred, poverty and grief, the magic of life disappears as soon as you choose to stop believing. Belief in magic takes patience and care. Many people have lost the ability to see small miracles that happen each day because they no longer believe in the inherent goodness of life.

Is Santa real? Yes, in many ways, he is. He is a real symbol for many important things in life. I only hope that when my children find out Santa’s merely a symbol for these, they won't be too disappointed. The world would be a much sadder place without Santa Claus. I was too young to realize the importance of Santa when I stole the magic from my sister, but I hope I am old enough now to pass on the wonder to my children.