Here a four things that you may find helpful in such situations.
1. It takes two to tango and you don't have to dance if you don't want to.
If you are expecting the other person to change who they are then you are probably in for more disappointment. Most people don't change and don't even want to change. Most people have their personality well and truly set by their late twenties and the older they get the less likely it is that they will change.
Remember that any successful relationship requires effort and positive intention on both sides. If you are the one doing all the work to make the relationship function happily then you are fighting a losing battle. Ask yourself if you really need to be in this relationship? If the answer is no then remove yourself from it.
2. You are in control of your emotions
You may not always be in control of the relationship but you can choose how you act and feel emotionally. Your emotions are not a product of outside forces, they are a product of your reaction to those outside forces. The good part about this is that you have within you the power to choose what that reaction will be. All it takes is a conscious decision to be in control and then a little practice to perfect the new "in control" habit.
3. The power of non-existence.
If for some reason beyond your control you can't remove yourself from the environment that the annoying person is in then there is a way that you can train that person in what constitutes reasonable behavior toward you.
Research has shown that the most powerful, results producing thing you can do to another person is to totally ignore their existence when they are behaving in ways that you find objectionable and then to act pleasantly toward them when they are acting in ways that you find reasonable.
For each and every person on this planet, including you and me, the most painful experience is to be totally ignored as if you don't even exist. Just imagine what it would be like if you were in a social gathering and people not only didn't speak to you or look at you but they acted as if you weren't even there at all.
Using this technique of totally ignoring the existence of a person when they are behaving in an unwanted manner and then interacting normally when their behavior improves has been showed to change the behavior of even retarded people with severe learning difficulties. It works even more powerfully on the so-called "normal" person.
4. Accept that your responsibility is to yourself, first and foremost.
When you have to deal with an unpleasant person it is important to remember that your first responsibility in this world is to your own survival, and that includes your emotional survival. If you cannot be happy and content within yourself then it is unlikely that you can help others be happy and content.
Because of your primary responsibility to yourself then you are totally within your rights to remove yourself from the company of people who threaten your emotional well being. It is also totally within your right to practice the ignoring strategy outline in point 3 above.
If you are feeling guilty in anyway for using these strategies then it is important for you to accept that taking care of your own emotional wellbeing is not only your right it is also your number one responsibility.
Its Driving Me Crazy
-Tender and aching
-Dry and feel ?tight?
-Itchy and uncomfortable
-Irritated, burning with redness or rash like symptoms
-Or just plain sore and ?not feeling right?
You could be like thousands of people who live with sore irritated scalp wondering where it came from, why it won't go away, no matter how many creams and shampoo treatments you use. I know it can very frustrating not having the answers you need to deal with the problem. When your scalp is sore, red And inflamed or itching like crazy you want to know how to get relief fast and at the same time deal with treating the cause; why your scalp is raw and sore in the first place so you can eliminate it & prevent the problem coming back to bother you again.
The positive news is that dermatologists will tell you that sore scalp symptoms can usually be narrowed down to a few common causes from the type of shampoo you have been using or sensitivity to hair dye to something as Seemingly benign as tying your hair up too tightly.
There are also a number of natural scalp remedies you can use to treat many scalp problems that work to soothe and heal your scalp bringing it back into balance again.
The first thing to do is to identify your issue. If you have dry scalp that feels tight you may have stripped the natural sebum from your scalp and affected the PH balance. This can occur when using a shampoo that contains harsh cleansers which are the equivalent to engine degreasers in some cases so naturally strip the oils from your scalp. Your scalp needs these oils to maintain its balance which functions to protect against yeast organisms such as Melassesia Globbosa or Pitysporum Ovale which result in dandruff and flaking. Then the further and continued use of cleansers can lead to chronic scalp itching. Makes sense when you think about it doesn't it?
The next thing you may notice is sore tender hair follicles?sometimes this can occur from having your hair tied up too tightly forcing your follicles into a direction which is uncomfortable after a period of time. It is also a little known fact though that many shampoos contain ingredients that corrode hair follicles and aggravate them around the roots. Obviously if these chemicals can wreak havoc on our follicles ? then they can also infiltrate and aggravate the sensitive glands that surround them producing the oils to keep your hair, scalp and follicles protected and balanced. This can result in ?scalp pimples? also where follicles become inflamed or infected.
There are of course other causes including ringworm. Ringworm of the scalp ( tinea capitis) is a superficial fungal infection of the scalp. Scalp ringworm is caused by mold-like fungi called dermatophytes. Ringworm infection occurs when a particular type of fungus grows and multiplies anywhere on your skin, scalp, or nails. It is far more common in children and symptoms include red, itchy patches on the scalp, leaving bald areas. The skin might itch and be red and peel or be scaly, have swollen blisters or a rash (that can spread) and looks like black dots. The rash is highly contagious. It is normally treated with over the counter products containing miconazole, clotrimazole, or similar. Sometimes Prescription antifungal skin medications, such as ketoconazole are needed to clear it up. There are also products direct from nature's factories that can aid the healing process and act as natural anti- biotics, although it must be said that ringworm is an aggressive fungus which needs to be monitored closely and treated accordingly.
If you have a bump or lump under the skin (commonly a lump behind the ears with no broken skin or rash developing, then this could be a cyst. Cysts are liquid filled pustules which can be painful when they become infected. If you have such symptoms I recommend seeing a doctor to be safe. Doctors can also treat cysts with antibiotics if they have become infected or incise them as a further but uncommon procedure if the antibiotics are not sufficient. Again, I would suggest visiting a doctor if you have these symptoms.
So what about the other causes listed above ?what can you do at home to help heal and clear up dandruff, dry itchy or sore scalp? Well first stop using harsh shampoos and go for natural Sulphate and paraben free shampoos that contain ingredients such as macadamia, wheatgerm or jojoba oils. These oils mimic our natural sebum to some extent to help to re moisturize and nourish our scalp.
Then there are lavender, rosemary and tea tree oils which contain antibacterial, healing properties. Neem oil great for its antifungal properties and stops itching.
Lavender calms the skin (as does chamomile tea cooled and used as hair rinse). As well as buying quality shampoos containing these ingredients, you can create your own combinations of remedies to soothe your scalp. Try seeping one cup of fresh lavender flowers and stalks, one cup of
Fresh rosemary and ? cup oatmeal in two cups of hot water. Strain and rinse your hair to soothe a sore scalp.
Here's another one:
Natural oils to assist healing, detox and stimulate hair growth: (Add to water (4 parts water 1 part oil) and spray onto scalp and you can add to your shampoo and conditioners also).
Oils To Relieve Itching: Lavender, German Chamomile and Eucalyptus Oils ( Mixed together and dabbed locally on effected areas has a soothing effect).
Neem oil is also a very good dandruff preventative which can be added to any of the formulas detailed below and is excellent for psoriasis and eczema.
Scalp massage with lavender oil (not scented ? the real oil) is another wonderful way to relieve the tension from a sore scalp as well as treat the issue. It also helps to re grow hair and repair the damage done to your follicles by chemicals in shampoos causing thinning hair.
There are many more remedies you can use to treat your scalp as well as many shampoos that are excellent value, contain no nasties to aggravate your scalp and hair follicles. It's really simple to treat yourself to your own pampering session and help heal your sore scalp. And then be kind to it by using only products that nourish your hair and scalp?. So have fun with oils and trying the remedies I mention. You can have beautiful hair & healthy scalp when you know what is good for it ? and what's not without spending a fortune and curing it yourself - naturally!
Both James Delrojo & Mia Wadsworth are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
James Delrojo has sinced written about articles on various topics from Outsourcing, Self Improvement and Motivation and Health. James Delrojo would like to help you by giving you hisebook "Unleash the Success Power of Your Mind" (valued at $27) completely FREE. Go to
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