Every time that I was praised, I felt very happy and proud. I felt noticed and appreciated. Whatever positive feelings I felt, I found that it is very difficult for me to settle down and focus on my work. This is because I was too excited by the event. In fact, I was not able to fall asleep. My mind kept replaying the event again and again. In the end, I had insomnia.



Every time that I was blamed, I felt very sad and shameful. Sometimes, I also felt anger because it is not my fault. Whatever negative emotions I felt, I found that it is very difficult for me to settle down and focus on my work. This is because I was too depressed by the event. In fact, I was not able to fall asleep. My mind kept replaying the event again and again. The end result is that I had insomnia.

In other words, praise and blame disturb the peacefulness of my mind. That is why I cannot settle down and concentrate on whatever I was trying to accomplish. I feel that this is a great disadvantage of praise and blame. Why?

Let imagine in a single day, I was praised and blamed for a couple of different things. Then my emotions would be going up and down, up and down, up and down the whole day. My mind would be so blown away by these events that I basically could not do anything for the rest of the day.

Thus, if I want to achieve the best result in whatever I am doing, I need to be at peace so that I can concentrate. That is I must avoid praise and blame. But it is impossible to avoid praise and blame! So, I have decided to find a workaround.

For a while, I was very puzzled for a solution. After researching and observing myself for a while, I realize that different people have different responses to the same situation. Someone who had lost a $10 note may feel more upset compared to another person. This is because he had attached more value to the $10 note. To a poor person like him, a $10 note means he can afford to eat for the next 3 meals. To another person, a $10 note means very little because he is very rich.

Based on this new understanding, I conclude that if I can reduce my perceived value of praise and blame, then my reactions will be reduced. If my reactions are reduced, I can better concentrate on my tasks on hand to achieve the best possible results.

The idea that I will like to share with you:

Learn to let go of praise and blame by reducing your perceived value of them.

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