It's the question posed by my mentor Kendall SummerHawk: "What is one thing you can let go of?"



The funny thing about the question is that in the moment when it's posed, whether in person, by phone or in an email, I always hit my mental 'pause' button. I become mentally calm and still, and have a distinct answer. Always.

And I've asked it of the members of the Sole Practitioners MasterMind group that I lead. I see each of the folks there have the same 'Oh! Yes..." reaction and realizations.

The question has been so powerful I've incorporated it in my conversations with my clients, friends, and family over the past two years. In some ways, asking it of others is a really productive way of bringing it up fresh for myself as well.

Take this past week for instance. I started Monday with a clear idea for my newsletter article. Then, as I prioritized my week, I knew...

I had to get a set of legal documents drafted, proofed, reviewed, agreed to and delivered (bless Andy Goodman for helping get this done!). AND I had to get the ball into action on the radio show I'll be hosting. AND I absolutely needed to get a new web page designed and up before the Summit I'm attending Friday through Sunday. AND I needed to completely change out my office so that it's a place I'm drawn to working in rather than avoiding.

And it all needed to be accomplished before I headed out of town for work with one of my clients.

I know from many conversations with my clients, that they find themselves running up against the same pressure to 'get it all done and done perfectly'... and here I am living it just like them, and likely you, too.

So, in my world, 'something' had to give. And the one thing that I know from personal experience is that I so value putting together a newsletter worth my readers' time that it might take me four hours. That's a block of time that I just couldn't guarantee I would have.

AND I've learned that 'cramming' to write and produce a newsletter - or any other project involving language - results in a jumble that's just plain confusing.

So there I was, with the pressure building in my muscles as my internal chatter kept telling me I had to get a perfect newsletter out and becoming more frustrated and critical of my not getting it done. All of which was keeping me distracted from getting other stuff accomplished.

So it was plainly time for me to take back control for myself.

Here's what that question triggered for me:

"What"

To answer the 'what' there's got to be a list. So what are all the things on that mental list, or physical To Do list that are singing a siren's song for attention?

"Is"

Here, now, in present time, what am I convinced must be taken care of...

"One Thing"

Among all of the actions that feel like 'musts' how do they line up in priority so that it's more evident to me which rank more urgent and important and time bound?

"I"

Recognizing it's my list, mine to own the items, mine to prioritize, mine to select among and mine to take action on or set aside...

"Can"

No pressure to do so yet, merely the recognition that the world really won't end if a particular item gets selected for removal from the 'should' and 'must' list.

"Let Go"

Absolutely reorienting to ask the mind and the body, to visualize releasing clenched attention, to stand back mentally and physically from all the insistence, and be separate from the To Do so it becomes an idea and an option...

"Of?"

It feels like an exhalation of relief as I say it out loud. My chest and arms relax. My mind snaps into clarity. I CAN let go of many things. And in this instance I'm clear about the choice I'm making,

And here's the gift of attention to give to other things I CHOOSE to get done.

So... What is one thing you can let go of?

Say "Yes!" and let go.

Copyright (c) 2008 Linda Feinholz