Money, money, money! Think of all of the intense emotions that money creates. There's probably nothing else in your life that makes you crazier, more desperate, and more unrealistic. I'm sure that like most people you have quite a love-hate relationship with money. At the very least, finances seems to always be at the forefront of your thoughts and your life. It seems to rule your life.



Almost everyone believes that if they just had more money, they would be happy. But, guess what? It's not true! Money, in and of itself, does not bring happiness—it's been proven again and again. In 1997, Hong and Duff researched twenty factors that most people believed contribute to our happiness. There were nineteen factors that they found do increase our happiness level. But, surprise, surprise...money was not one of them! Financial prosperity, in fact, seems to have almost no effect on our level of happiness. Let that fact sink deep into your brain.

You may think that somehow you are different. If you could just make $25,000 more a year, you could pay the bills and mortgage and live stress-fee. That would surely make a person happy, right? Wrong...and the research proves it.

So, how can we truly realize that money doesn't buy happiness? How on earth can it be done? Well, for starters, if you believe that mere money will make you happy, then you have a dysfunctional relationship with money. You are placing unrealistic expectations upon what your finances can do for you. The first thing you need to do is fix your relationship with money so that it is healthy and functional.

Don't get me wrong. We all need money. We need to pay the rent, buy groceries, and pay for the car repairs. Those things aren't magically going to take care of themselves. So, yes, in a nutshell we do need a certain amount of financial security. But, once we attain the basic necessities of food and shelter, it really doesn't matter how much we make. We're not going to be happier making $150,000 a year.

This is the story of America. Whenever we make more money, we want more things. We spend more, consume more and need more.

A few years ago, Showtime produced an interesting documentary. The documentary profiled Ted Rodrigue who had been homeless for more than a decade. Ted was not an alcoholic or drug-addict. He was completely sound of mind and body. Ted blamed bad luck and unfortunate circumstances on his homelessness.

Showtime gave Ted $100,000 in order to help him turn his life around. In addition, they offered him counseling and an opportunity for employment. Showtime was interested in seeing if money would solve and erase all of Ted's problems.

In just a matter of months, Ted had spent all of his money and was once again homeless. Money had not changed him or solved any of his problems.

We tend to view this story with judgment. We somehow think that we would never make the same decisions that Ted did. But, why do over 90% of ALL people who come into money lose it after a few years? Moreover, most of these same people end up declaring bankruptcy and are worse-off than where they started!

Don't trick yourself into thinking that money magically solves all of your problems. It generally carries with it a whole new set of problems that most people are not equipped to solve effectively.

Even if you achieve all the riches that your heart desires, you will not change. That much is true. If you are unhappy now, you will be unhappy with riches. If you constantly look for outside factors to make you happy, you will look for outside factors to make you happy with riches.

But, there is an important first step: fix your relationship with your money—now! Your money has been controlling your life and you have allowed it. Stop. This is the first thing that must change. You must control your money. You are in charge. Money is your servant. However, to be in charge of your financial situation, you will need to learn how to be a good and fair master. If you learn these strategies, money will work hard for you.

However, most people are slaves to their money. Their finances rule their lives and often dictate their emotions and feelings. This needs to change. You must learn to be in complete command. Money is your servant and you hold all of the power.

But how do you fix this relationship? You have allowed your finances to control your life for years. How do you now take back the reins and put yourself in charge of your money? It is the exact same way that you would fix any problem—hard work and dedication.

The first thing you need to do is change your views about your finances. You need to look at money in a way that you never have before. You are going to take a fresh perspective on this relationship.

At this moment in time, how do you view your relationship with money? Do you feel like it has too much control over your feelings and your life? Do you hate what it has done to your life? Do you feel like it is ruining your life?

You must take full responsibility for your problematic relationship with money. You have allowed your finances to control your life. You have not been in control. If you are willing to admit it, most of your problems with your money are because you are not the one in charge. You allowed your money to run rampant and get out of control. You spent, borrowed, spent again and lost control.

However, it is not too late. You can still learn the strategies to take back control and insist that your money work for you. You will now be in charge.

You will become the master of your money and will learn to use it carefully. Even though you will learn to control your money, you still must treat it with great concern. You need to reflect on how you have treated your money in the past. Were you careless? Were you appreciative? Did you take it for granted? Were you abusive? Did you always want more and more even though you didn't always treat money well?

Just like with any problem in life, you need to learn strategies that will put you at peace with your finances. Money will always be in your life—just like a difficult mother-in-law. There is nothing you can do to get rid of your money problems. You simply need to learn to take control and deal effectively with your financial situation.

The more you carelessly toss money around, the less control you will have. Instead, you need to take the reins and put yourself back in charge of all of your financial problems. There are many solutions that will move you into this position.

However, until you truly understand that it is you that must always be in absolute control, money will control your life.

Even though you are the master, you must always treat money well. You need to appreciate and not take it for granted. Once you begin to take back control over your finances your relationship will immediately change.

You will soon begin to have a healthy relationship with your money. You will soon stop expecting so much and instead be appreciative of all that you already have.

In fact, your money is much like a child and needs rules, boundaries and discipline to fully function. It does not want to be in charge. In fact, your money is crying out for you to take control!

Your money is willing to work hard for you, you just need to step up, take responsibility and learn the strategies to put yourself in charge.