Being there is one of the essential things an anxiety and panic attacks sufferer really needs. This time of their life is so very scary and they feel alone and as if they are not normal anymore. By showing them that you are there for them when they need you you will eleviate those feelings over time. You have an opportunity to strengthen your relationship ten fold and really pull each other closer through this episode of their life.

It is so important for you to learn as much as you can about anxiety and panic attacks, so that you can understand what they are going through. You will never truly understand if you have never lived through a panic attack and dealt with un-ending thoughts of when the next one is coming. However, if you learn as much as you can about this you can learn to understand what is happening. Anxiety is basically living in fear all day every day, and fear makes you think irrationally. You need to understand that their thoughts alot of times will be irrational and how to bring them back to a rational state of mind WITHOUT stressing them further then they already are. It is a big job and I commend you for your preparedness to take this on. Your loved ones will benefit greatly from a person like you.

Learn... so that you can understand!

The key to helping a loved one with anxiety and panic disorder, lies in reassurance techniques.

You have got to learn how to get them thinking rationally again. Not with your own thoughts, but how to manipulate the sufferers thoughts. I use the word manipulate here and I mean it in a positive way. I am not to sure how to put these techniques into my own words, as I was the one recieving the help. So what I can do is tell you things my wife and family did for me that worked wonders.

My wife learned that I needed to hear it from a professional or someone I truly trusted my health too. So when I would ask her if something was wrong with me she would say things like "I think you're fine but what do you think Antoinette (my therapist back then) would say about your symptoms right now." I would then, in my minds eye, see myself explaining to my therapist that I have a headache that I think is turning into a brain aneurisym. I could see her explaining how rare that actually is, and that I am young and eating healthier now so they likely hood of that is rediculous. Even though I did not have a professional around at the moment, my wife was able to bring one to me through manipulating my thinking patterns. 99% of the time this worked instantly. My mind told my body I was ok because as far as my mind knew, I just spoke with my therapist and she said I was ok! haha I know sounds kinda crazy, but the mind is a crazily powerful organ.

Another thing my wife would do was to ask me specific questions in return to the "am I ok" question, I would ask her. Ok that sounds more confusing then it is. This is how it would play out. I would aks her if I looked ok, and she would say back, "you look fine nothing has changed in the last hour. What was the name of that song you and Jason (an old buddy) used to listen to over and over again, when you guys rode around in your old car? This would break my mind free of the negative thoughts I was thinking, so that it could think about her question. Even though it only broke my thoughts up for a few seconds, that is long enough to reset the brain. The trick is to ask a question that will inspire a positive thought(s). She got really good at this and learned how to always have an arsenal of comebacks. If I made a comment about how good a restaurant was or a commercial I liked, she immediately logged it in as a, "brain breaker," as she called them.

You will have to learn as many techniques as you can to help your loved one with their anxiety and panic attacks. Using just one technique over and over will become "he is just using that stupid technique to get me to shut up." We know you are trying to help and that it is not easy to live, with someone going through this time in their life. Its not our real self that is making us think these super negative thoughts, it is the anxiety talking. Just like alcohol can make people say things they don't mean, anxiety can have the same effect. I cherish the fact that you are trying to help your loved one, they truly need it. You must learn as much about anxiety and panic attacks as you possibly can, to help them the way they need to be helped. I tell anxiety sufferers to get obsessed with learning about and fighting anxiety. This goes the same for someone trying to help out a loved one. I wish you and yours the best.

I would say the best way to learn about anxiety and panic attacks is to do it together with your loved one. They need as much positivity as they can get right now. One thing I loved was my wife would sometimes surprise me with helpful products geared towards anxiety and panic attacks. She once heard of a anti-anxiety self help system being offered on the radio with a 30 day free trial. She called up and secretly had it sent to the house. I was so shocked the day it came in and then really blown away when she offered to go through it with me. It was a week of total positivity and we became so much closer. It felt more like best friends hanging out then it did husband and wife. Today, Jokingly she says " I just didn't want to read the books and listen to the tapes by myself!" haha... It is true though, self-help programs can get very boring and monotonious. Everynight before bed we would listen to one of the tapes or read a chapter together in the book. For those that have a hard time sleeping (most anxiety and panic attack sufferers do) this is an amazing way to help. It sets up such a positive and helpful mood right before bed. Which re-trains the mind that night time is not so scary. If you'd like to know where to find great anti-anxiety programs and books, without worry of buying into one of the many SCAMS out there. I have set up links inthe about the author section below." These are the best of breed programs and books out on the market today.