The Internet gives you access to almost any subject, all with a mouse click. On one hand, it's a positive tool, and highly useful to a growing number of people. On the other hand, it can be used for negative, devious purposes. Dark ideologies find their way onto the Internet. Perverse and offensive information is disseminated alongside good, non-offensive information.



Online dating is not without its share of unscrupulous individuals who use the Internet for deceptive practices. Quite simply, they engage in online dating scams.

Define Online Dating Scams

Online dating scams are money-for-romance deceptions, geared to prey on individuals who may be lonely and vulnerable. They may be created by male or female. They frequently originate in Russia or Nigeria.

How Online Dating Scams Work

If you are the victim of online dating scams, you will be contacted through the online dating service with which you registered. The scammer will identify himself/herself falsely, and talk about a great interest in your photo and profile. You will be referred to a photo online. The photo is not of the scammer, of course. It is generally stolen from the online portfolio of a modeling agency so you will believe a very attractive person is interested in dating you. The practice is routine for online dating scams.

After brief contact, online dating scams progress rapidly to the need for money. Your “date” longs to visit you, but has no money for plane, hotel room, and other expenses. If you would send cash via Western Union, your attractive “date” will be on the way! You will usually be asked to send the money to Nigeria, although some online dating scams originate in Russia.

One variation of online dating scams is the “date” who just traveled to Nigeria on business (or as a tourist) and was arrested by corrupt officials. Your “date” needs an emergency wire transfer for bail or bribery to gain freedom.

Another variation of online dating scams is the “date” who traveled to Nigeria or Russia and became ill from eating the local food. Money has run out, but an emergency wire transfer from you could get urgently needed medical care, or bring your potential soul mate safely home.

Most online dating scams have money going to Africa, usually by Western Union wire transfer.

In most online dating scams, the “date” always seems to need more money to meet unexpected additional expenses.

Online dating scams, at their core, date back to the classic Spanish Prisoner scams of the Renaissance.

How Online Dating Scams Escape Detection

Many low-cost or free online dating services have no screening process for members. Anyone can join without qualifying. Scammers gain entry, and quickly begin to weave a web of deceit.

Online dating scams prey on those who are less likely to attract large numbers of contacts. They tell the vulnerable person what they want to hear – namely, that they are very desirable. They make hollow promises about the wonderful life together that they will build. The prey believes this is that special person.

Once the trap is set, online dating scams move to the request for money. Most ask for a wire transfer, but some request financial information. Since they have broken down the defenses of their prey, the money or financial information is provided without suspicion. If the truth becomes known, the prey may be too embarrassed to report the deception.

Since online dating scams often originate in foreign countries, those who have been stun by them will find it almost impossible to prosecute or recover any loss.

Signs of Online Dating Scams

Online dating scams often give off warning signs. Knowledge of them can protect you and your money.

* Name Dropping. The scammer names notable people among his/her friends. A reputable business firm may be given as the place of employment. They may provide information that seems to link them to an event reported by reputable media.

* Undeserved Praise. Online dating scams often treat contacts as though they are worthy of great praise. Someone far more attractive, with stellar qualifications, has chosen you as soul mate.

* Too Good. The potential date in online dating scams often seems too good to be true. Stolen photos and falsified profiles present an individual that surely has plenty of dates.

* Non-specific Information. Online dating scams seldom limit themselves to one person at a time. The person running them responds in generalities because he/she is writing to hundreds of individuals at the same time. The same e-mail is broadcast to one and all.

* Emotional Need. Online dating scams seldom look like romance-for-money fraud. The emotional needs presented to you and hundreds of others sound real. Online dating scams play on your emotions when they speak of sickness or groundless incarceration.

* Financial Request. The clearest tip-off may be the request for money or financial information. Many online dating scams will ask for wire transfers via Western Union. Some, however, ask for information that will meet their financial need. They may want your credit card information, or access to your banking account.

Online Dating Safety When Confronting Scams

Online dating scams can take more than your money. They can get information that ends with identity theft. They can get personal information that could leave you in physical danger. Protect yourself from online dating scams with these 5 tips.

1. Choose carefully. Acquire membership only on quality online dating services. Do your homework before registering. Online dating scams are less likely to occur on sites that require detailed information. It's not worth the effort when they can use free, open services.

2. Check background. If your online dating service does not automatically check all prospective members, do a background check on anyone in whom you have interest. One woman typed her “date's” name into an online search engine – and discovered he had been sent to prison for murder!

3. Be Guarded. If a contact seems too good to be true, dig deeper. Suggest that he/she appear before a webcam so you can see them in person. If the praise you receive seems unmerited, leave room for doubt. If your specific questions are answered vaguely or generally, end the relationship.

4. Stand Firm. Don't be swayed by emotional pleas. A contact worthy of further involvement is not likely to burden you with emotional needs. Don't fall victim to deceptive sob stories. If you are tempted to believe, at least seek additional, verifying information.

5. Don't Pay. Online dating scams want only one thing – your money. Never give any personal information, including real name, address, e-mail, phone number, credit card, and bank information. Never wire money to anyone.

Online dating scams are not likely to go away. It's up to you to learn as much as you can about them, and to treat every online contact with a measure of suspicion.