Cool! - jump in, the online dating waters are just fine. And by the way, you'll encounter over 3 MILLION others already splashing around when you do decide to take the plunge. So you'll have lots of new and interesting company.
If you're new, or relatively new to the online dating scene, this article will get you headed down the right path. Follow the tips and recommendations presented here and your initial experiences will be more enjoyable and yield better results.
Do a search of "online dating", and you'll be presented with more than 2.9 MILLION web pages from which to make your selection! Hmm, a bit overwhelming to say the least. But don't let the huge numbers discourage you. Try the selection method below, and you can easily find your perfect dating site match.
Your first order of business, as stated above, will be getting matched up with one or more dating sites that fit you and your needs. The questions below should help you narrow things down.
What Type Dating Site?
Plain Vanilla - no ethnic, religious or cultural themes. Black/Ebony/African American, Asian, Italian, Christian, Senior Citizen, the choices are numerous.
Do some searching using the terms below as a guide.
"online dating" + senior
"online dating" + Christian
"online dating" + ebony OR black OR African American
"online dating" + Asian
"online dating" +
Get the idea? A search on each of the examples above will yield pretty much what you would expect.
If you're on a tight budget, just add the word "free".
"online dating" + free
"online dating" + senior + free ...etc.
A note about free sites..., REALLY FREE dating sites with lots of members, and lots of member services, and activity are pretty hard to come by. You'll understand better after you do a few searches for free dating websites.
A search for dating reviews and forums can be helpful also.
"online dating" + reviews
"online dating" + forum
With the dating related forums you can read about good and bad experiences others have had with particular dating and personals web sites.
Dating services reviews will give you some good info as well. Look for genuine, unbiased reviews. Many of the dating reviews sites out there are willy-nilly listings someone threw together to earn commissions.
Another way to find good dating sites, is by asking friends and co-workers who may have tried, or are using online dating or personals services. You may be surprised to find out how many of your friends are members of some personals site or other.
How Much?
Monthly fees vary widely, but the average is around $24. Most dating/singles sites will give you a discount if you pay for 2, 3, 6 or 12 months in advance.
I would suggest you only buy into a one month membership with any new dating service you join. If you decide you like it, then extend your membership. If you don't like the service, you've cut your loses, and avoided the hassles of requesting a refund, or canceling billing.
Tight Budget Dating Tip: Most free dating sites have low activity, and member activity is what makes personals and dating sites tick.
Solution: Join 3, 4 or more free dating sites. If you find that their combined activity serves your needs... you're good to go. If not, you'll have gained a good familiarity with online dating, and a better understanding of what you want, when and if you decide to plunk down some bucks for a paid membership.
Telling Your Pool-Side Story
Now write your story (aka: member profile). No great detail, just write like you're writing to the man or woman you seek.
Write a little about you. State one or more of your unique qualities. Write a little about the person you're seeking.
You'll save some time if you write and save all your profile data to a text editor or word processor file. Then, you can COPY and PASTE it to the proper area of your online dating profile.
As things change, and as you grow, you will want to update and modify your profile statements.
A Picture Is Worth a Thousand Words
You will generally get 3 to 10 times better response with a posted photo than without. People don't generally dwell too long on profiles with no photos... so take the hint.
If you don't have a digital camera, web cam or scanner, take a few photos and a diskette to your local OfficeDepot, Staple or office supply store. They should be able to scan you photos to diskette. Then you can easily add one or more to your dating site profile. You could also ask friends and relatives who own a digital camera or scanner.
Digital cameras, web cams, and scanners are very inexpensive these days. Check eBay for some of the best deals.
Stay Focused and On-Track
You may want to start a journal, (on paper, or in a text file) to log your "love search" progress. Make notes of URL links of sites you liked, new member specials, monthly fees, member benefits and services, restrictions, etc.
When I first started, I also wrote out a statement describing what I wanted to accomplish by joining a dating site. You may want to do the same. These statements, and a journal will help keep you focused and organized. Organized endeavors always yield greater results than haphazard approaches.
Date-Safe Policies
This is actually part of the title of an upcoming article, but I mention it here to stress use of common sense, safety and caution when dealing with ANY dating situation - on or offline.
The Internet is definitely one of the best available resources if you are looking to find someone special, but be warned there are also many dangers associated with online dating. While both men and women are at risk it is generally the woman who will be exposed to the more serious dangers and we would like to help you to protect yourself and to stay safe. Here are a few dangers of this form of dating that you should be mindful of in your pursuit of internet love and happiness.
Beware of Scam Artists
By far, one of the biggest dangers of online dating is becoming involved in one of the many scams circulating the internet. You have probably already heard stories about people who subscribed to one of the many dating sites to try and find love and friendship and who ended up getting conned. Generally these cons involve money but often the perpetrators are more interested in trying to taking advantage of the other person in a sexual way.
Police enforcement agencies work diligently to identify the thousands of con artists out there working the many different online dating companies around the world. Their job in weeding out these con artists is often quite difficult given the anonymity that the perpetrators are provided over the internet. In fact the con artist can be on the other side of the world but is able to lead you to believe that they are quite local to you.
It is often not too difficult to spot a scammer as generally they will try to get as much information from you as quickly as possible. As soon as you meet online they generally ask quite personal questions such as your marital status, age, appearance, job and other information so that they can build a profile of you. They often push you to send them photographs and they eagerly try to send you theirs. In an attempt to gain your interest the photograph that they are all to willing to send through is more than likely not of themselves, but instead a snapshot of some very good looking person. They will also badger you for your home address, email address and phone contact numbers on the pretence that they want to get to know you better.
If at this stage you begin to feel uncomfortable it is important that you cease contact with this person immediately rather than run the chance of getting hooked in. Any typical and respectable online dater will be aware that you don't just hit the other person with loads of personal questions, as they are aware for the need to build a relationship online before trying to meet in person.
When it comes to meeting in person take note of what is being said and try to verify their true identity and personal circumstance from the information they have already revealed to you. If you intend to meet your new online friend in person for the first time it should be done in a very public place or while you are in a group. If the other person objects to a group or public place meeting then your alarm bells should start ringing as the chances are that they are hiding something - perhaps they are married (when they tell you they are not) or maybe their intentions are not aligned with honor and integrity.
Provided that you always proceed with caution and take the necessary steps to keep yourself safe you should not have any serious problems with your dating experiences. Having said that there definitely dangers associated with online dating but there are also ways to avoid them. So if you have been reluctant to go online and meet someone then put your fear aside and live a little. Use your common sense, always follow your gut instinct and only meet in a public place or group environment until you are absolutely comfortable with your online date. Internet dating is the way of the future and there are thousands of happy couples who would not be together if it was not for this new medium of meeting people.
Both C Raymond Merrick & Madonna Jeffries are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
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