One of the most powerful things about online dating is its ability to break down barriers. People who are from entirely different backgrounds and beliefs are able to come together by realizing they have more things in common than they realize. If the same situation was presented to them in the offline world than the chances are they would not be receptive. Not to say that internet dating online is one large community free of hang-ups where you will find the love of your life instantly. It is not and no one should fool themselves into thinking otherwise.



Like the offline world, online dating requires continuous learning about the other person. In fact it may be a little more detailed since it requires the proper image that puts you in a more positive light as well as constant messaging and chatting before you even decide to meet face to face. For this reason it is crucial to ask certain questions to let you know where the other person stands.

1. What are you looking for in a potential partner?

This is a pretty basic question but you would be surprised at how many people it trips up. Why because many people do not have a clue as to what they are looking for in the other person. Pay special attention to their answer. Do they go into detail that pleases you or turns you off? If they say they don't know than that is a clear indication to take the relationship even slower and a little bit more cautiously. That "I don't know" response maybe genuine or they could be hiding something.

2. If you have done this before how did it go?

You may find yourself attracted to a person who has gone through the online dating experience previously. If things did not go well pay attention to how they express it. Do they trash the other person unmercifully or do they blame themselves to the point of unhealthy self pity? There is nothing wrong with singing the blues about what went wrong but if their answer is at either extreme than watch out.

3. What makes a good relationship?

When they answer do they talk in terms of an equal partnership or does it seem like one person (you) should go out their way to meet the majority of expectations of the other person (them)? This is an excellent question for gauging what your relationship will be like if you choose to pursue it.

Keep in mind that even if they answer all of these questions to your satisfaction, you should let your instincts play a major role in your decision making process. In some cases the person could be giving you the answers they think you want to hear and not necessarily what they believe. Now it maybe they like you so much they want to please you or it could be deception plain and simple. You do not know so use your instincts and take it slow.

You are not asking these questions to start an argument or make the other person uncomfortable but to get a sense of what the future may hold for the both of you. Therefore do not be afraid to ask. If the other person is really on the same wavelength as you then they will be only too happy to answer. Also be ready to offer your take on these questions. A big part of a good relationship is communication and that involves some give and take on everybody's part.