That a woman can have it all and do it all at the same time is a totally attainable. The part we do not realize is that we cannot do both simultaneously. Being a perfect woman, mom and wife is an illusion. It does not exist, and cannot exist.



In my many years of traveling and meeting women, I have run into many types of women, but none have been all in one. Of course, it is totally possible to be successful in your career, have a great marriage and be a wonderful mother, but I do not believe it is possible for all of these things to be happening simultaneously. If there is a woman who begs to differ, she is certainly lying.

Making good choices will make a successful life. Successful women analyze their situation and make priorities. Doing as your mother did or what your colleague does may not be the best decision for you. It doesn't make you a failure, either. You have to make choices that are best for you. You have to do what makes you feel fulfilled and happy.

I have had many cases of people doing one thing while wanting to do another and never feeling happy or fulfilled, or feeling a failure for not being able to do all of what they are expected to. I had an email from Emily, who purchased Light His Fire and Light Her Fire, she writes, "Being a good mother was my first priority but for the past few years, I've been buried by diapers. Having three children all under the age of five has consumed all of my time. It was my husband's idea that we get both programs and concentrate on each other for a while. We had begun to feel like strangers. Now it's time to get back being a wife." I have also received letters with the exact opposite situation.

When a woman focuses on her career, her home and children will have less of her focus, it is not possible for her to focus on all three at the same time. My program also explains how to focus on your husband, you will have to exclude your children at times. You will feel less guilt once you stop trying to be supermom and superwoman.