People will be attracted to you, be persuaded by you and willing to help you toward your ends, to do the things that you want them to do.



To be a person of high integrity go the extra mile, do more than you have promised. If you an appointment, you are early for your appointment. You respect the other person's time, you do not come late. That communicates your time is more important than theirs.

Which brings me to the other issue, some people might say, "But, if I have high esteem, I'm proud and really like myself, won't I be arrogant?

That's not true, unless you think you are better than somebody else; that is what arrogance means. Arrogance says "I am better than you." True high self esteem means that you are excellent and the other person is excellent. You regard them as highly as you regard yourself. It is a win-the win situation.

We have been talking about going the extra mile, doing more than promised, being on time for appointments, respecting the other person's time, making promises that you keep. If you really want to go the extra mile, what you should really do is under-promise and over-deliver. That is, promise less but give more than the person expects. That will amaze them, they will feel good about you and you will feel good about yourself.

You can feel good about yourself even when other people do not feel good about you, but it certainly helps and makes it easier when other people feel good about you too.

The person of integrity is always honest, which can be a challenge. I remember sometime ago I took my family on vacation to Travis City and on the way back we stopped at a nice restaurant. So we ordered a meal. When it came time to pay the bill, I discovered that I did not have my wallet. I realized I had locked it in the trunk, along with the key to the trunk. In those days there were two keys to the cars, an ignition key and a trunk key.

I explained my problem to the manager and he was understanding and gave me his address and I fully intended to mail him a check the very next day I got home. Well, I was surprised how I hesitated writing that check. I have to admit that I thought to myself, oh gees, he's miles away, I will never see him again, I could use that extra money.

It took me about an hour of arguing with myself before I finally wrote the check and sent it to him. I soon felt good and felt proud, I know I will never see him again, but I realize that whatever you are doing, someone is watching. Someone is watching, I am not talking about God, although that might be true, but there is someone that we know is always watching everything you do -- that person is you. You have an observing part that evaluates and judges you. And you know, you know deep in your heart when you are doing the right thing. When you do the right thing, how proud you feel of yourself. And you know when you do the wrong thing, you might forget it and think that although you did something that was not quite right, you will get away with it. But I knew that if I did not pay that bill, that knowledge would be down in my brain, lurking, just beneath my conscious mind and I would not be feeling proud and good about myself. You want to be able to hold your head up high, look people in the eye and you will communicate something to them on an unconscious basis perhaps, but they will know you are a person of integrity and quality. They will respect you, trust you, do business with you and you will accomplish more than you ever dreamed that you could.

Let me sum up. To have ultimate happiness, you must give yourself unconditional high self regard. Accept yourself no matter how many imperfections you have, no matter how many mistakes you make. In order to accept yourself totally, you have to do things that are not always easy, but things of which you can be proud.

Let me end by challenging you to always be a person of high integrity.

This is an important key to being a winner in life and business.