Anyone who says that it's difficult to get a man to fall for you has not learned a few tricks of the trade. You have at your disposal a number of crafty methods to build intimacy with a guy even on the first date that are so clever he will never know you are worming your way into his heart until it is too late and you have moved in there and taken over. But these methods are not cheating or using mind control on them that would be frightening if you became that kind of girl. These methods are simple techniques of human communication that can help you in every aspect of life.



It is true that we only communicate a small part of what we mean in what we say, the other part is in our body language and this can be saying the complete opposite to what we say verbally. Men are dumb to body language, women are 10 times more receptive to it so they take it for granted that a man should know what her signals say. But by using stronger signals and by watching for what signals he is giving, then you can achieve your goal.

Every small act can communicate something to the guy you are with, a movement of your hands, a look from your eyes, all can turn a date from being a dud to being electrifying. The best way to start to learn is to watch others when you are out. You can start to see when people are open and in agreement, laughing and joking away, leaning in together. And when they are having an argument or one of them is bored, when they are leaning back with their arms crossed etc. If you inadvertently give the wrong signals you can come across as bored or even hostile towards your date!

To give the message that he has your full attention and that you find him interesting then use a slight smile and lean forward towards him and he will hear that message loud and clear. Also pay attention to your hands, are they at your side or on the table as if reaching towards him? If you do that then you are signalling that he can come to you for friendship and love. If you then turn your palms upwards it shows openness as well.

The easiest way to lower barriers between you is with 'accidental' touches, touch his hand when you laugh sometimes, ask him to hold you steady while you remove a stone from your shoe etc. This allows you to breach the barrier of physical contact and create more intimacy while appearing innocent. Whispering is also highly intimate, yet also innocent enough to do without raising any objections from him. Lean across during the night and whisper in his ear about something you just saw and he'll be powerless to resist you (but have fun watching him try!).

Echoing and mirroring are two other methods body language experts say create an instant bond between you and the man you want to get to know. Mirroring consists of watching his gestures, how he sits and how he uses his head and arms and mimicking those movements in a very subtle way. In that way, when he looks at you, it's like looking at a mirror of himself and that makes him feel you are very much like him and someone he wants to know better.

You can also take it a step further and emulate the way he talks. I don't mean copy his accent or he will think you are mocking him. But watch the way he talks, does he talk gently or loudly? Does he talk for long bursts and then stop or in little segments? You can then take his lead and copy his style, again he will feel a bond with you but won't know why... you will be gently creating the 'click' that happens on a great date.

These little tips can be devastatingly effective and really get that guy to open up to you so you get to know the real person inside. You can then decide if he is right for you or not and if he is then you know exactly what to do now and at any other stage in your relationship to get him to open up to you and appreciate you, which is an invaluable skill, just make sure he never knows you are doing it on purpose!