So, I have a bone to pick with someone and thus is my lament: Who initiated and perpetuated the rumor that modesty means that a woman must forfeit femininity, beauty, elegance, grace, and style? Certainly, this is a fallacy. To insinuate, allude to, or directly state that modesty is the antithesis of femininity and squelches the inherent grace and beauty of womanhood and her unique features, is to forget that modesty, by definition, is humility. And humility is considered a noble, godlike quality. It is of the divine and therefore modesty perfectly illustrates, accentuates, enhances, and emphasizes a woman's divine design and that she, indeed, is a goddess in embryo. She is royalty. Take, for example, Princess Grace of Monaco, Princess Diana of Wales, or Queen Victoria. Each of these women fashioned wedding dresses that were the envy of every woman, and they were modest. In fact, Queen Victoria, when she married Prince Albert, was the first monarch to wear a modest wedding dress—that was white. Hence, she set a long-standing standard and ideal for all brides. Frankly, Queen Victoria changed women's fashion; epitomizing grace, class, sophistication, elegant, beauty, virtue, and refinement. This was only re-emphasized when Princess Grace married Prince Rainier.





Recently, a friend of mine went shopping for the perfect wedding gown for her upcoming marriage. This is not the first time I accompanied a friend on trip to locate and seize the perfect (and modest) wedding gown. To be honest, I have known ladies who have already bought their wedding dresses, though they are not engaged, because they spotted the most perfectly gorgeous dream dress and therefore seized the opportunity. While preparing for a wedding is idyllic and filled with great anticipation, there is an element of stress and worry; however, finding the wedding dress of your dreams does not have to intensify this stress. By following these simple pointers, listed below, you are not only guaranteed to find the perfect wedding gown, but the process will be pain-free, worry-free, and therefore stress-free.



Finding the Perfect Gown

1. Flip through your favorite bridal magazines (since you have already obtained a subscription to at least 10 different ones) to get an idea of what kind of dress you want. With this idea in mind, you can save time searching for the gown that fits your specific criteria.

2. Start searching for your gown early! If you need alternations, special modifications, or sizing, it can take several weeks up to a couple of months. The sooner you start shopping the better.

3. Establish (and adhere) to a realistic budget. Let's face it—weddings are not cheap. If you are aware of how much you can realistically spend on your wedding dress, you won't run the risk of falling madly in love with something you simply can't afford.

4. Take only one or two people with you. It is less stressful having only a couple of close friends with you as you shop for a wedding dress, first and foremost, because you will then avoid being bombarded with a slew of differing opinions urging you and coaxing you. Your closest friends will be encouraging and enthusiastic as you locate and pinpoint your ideal wedding gown. Remember: This is your wedding and your gown, not your mother-in-law's or your room-mate's. It's your day. The bride is boss.

5. Avoid shopping on a Saturday if at all possible. Call the bridal boutique ahead of time to schedule an appointment or find out when store is least busy. This way you avoid crowds, confusion, and even claustrophobia. By scheduling an appointment, you receive more personalized attention and assistance that caters to your specific needs. Plus, there are usually unadvertised sales going on during the “non peak” hours, hence saving you a little money. (The perfect dress and extra cash – what bride would object to that?)

6. Don't be afraid of trying something different. Occasionally, a bride will discover that she will fall in love with a certain cut or style (e.g., Empire waist versus A-line) that she might not originally thought of considering. Don't settle. It's okay to be selective. After all, you are shopping for a modest wedding gown that makes you feel like a Queen on the most important day of your life.

7. Don't be afraid to try on capped sleeve gowns. If you feel that a cap sleeve does not fit in with your idea of a modest wedding gown, you can have sleeves added from extra material ordered from the original manufacturer.

8. Use an experienced seamstress. When considering alternations or additions to your dress…be careful! Be picky. Choose wisely. Choose only an experienced seamstress; a professional, if budget permits. Provide a written detail of exactly what you need done before signing an agreement with the seamstress. Choosing a qualified seamstress will prevent heartache and the extra expense of a ruined wedding gown.

9. Consider religious traditions. If your wedding is being consecrated in a religious setting, or is taking place in a chapel, consider the rules and traditions and be sure that your dress respects those rules and traditions. If you are LDS and preparing for a temple wedding, there are a variety of gorgeous, stylish temple dresses customized for such a sacred ceremony as a temple wedding.

10. Ask around. Women are the best at word-of-mouth advertising. When we like something we tell everyone we know about it (and we do the same for things we dislike, too). Ask your friends who are recently married about their experiences with choosing the perfect, modest wedding gown and what their recommendations are so that you can save time, save money, and save your sanity.

11. Shopping for your wedding gown can and should be a fun and enjoyable experience. Take pictures so you can remember the fun times for years to come. Besides, taking pictures helps with remembering which dresses you liked the most and therefore narrows in on finding “the one” perfect wedding dress.