The death of a loved one is always a terrible thing to endure; it can take you by surprise and send you in to a whirlwind of grief and emotion. But making this terrible event even that much more traumatic is the amount of planning and activity that must suddenly take place. Not only are you in a fragile emotional state but you must now coordinate a host of events surrounding the funeral. Funeral planning, however, while heartbreaking, does not have to compound your already heightened levels of stress.
The nature of the funeral is largely dependent on the deceased's culture and traditions surrounding death. But, in the United States, most funerals – while personalized to the family's customs – follow much of the same format. And following a format will allow you to go step-by-step through the planning process with as little discomfort as possible.
First and foremost, when it comes to funeral planning, it is necessary to choose the venue for the funeral. Luckily, this is almost always done prior to death; many towns frequent the same funeral home or the deceased may have chosen one during their lifetime. A reputable funeral home will be able to guide you through the funeral arrangements with experience and compassion. You may choose to have a viewing and then a funeral mass at a church; the involvement of religious services is completely up to you as you consider what the deceased would have wanted. The funeral planning really begins here as you work with the funeral home to arrange services - on their property or through a religious organization - as well as burial arrangements.
There are some details involved with funeral planning that generate the tone that you wish for the services. You will have the ability to choose flowers, music, and a number of other details that will help personalize the service. The important thing to remember is that you are honoring the life of someone you love; try during this very difficult time, to reflect the personality of your loved one through the funeral services.
Of course, in some cases, people will take their own funeral planning into their hands many, many years before their death. Perhaps there are details that are important to them and they wish to be included in their funeral. This may seem like a morbid process, but it can be an exceedingly generous gift to family members left behind; it gives them the ability to simply put into motion the decisions their family member has already made.
Funeral planning – while difficult and very sad – can be done with strength and love as you plan the final goodbye for your loved one.
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There are some funeral home personnel that will take advantage of this cloudy judgment and we end up making unsound decisions because we were easy to convince by a stranger that our loved one would have wanted the extravagant casket, the convoy of limos and the huge wreath of roses. In our shock at this time, it is easy for us to agree. Then, later, when the bills start to come in, we have to deal with trying to find money to pay them while still dealing with our loss. This whole scenario does not have to happen.
These days, funerals are expensive enough without adding to it by agreeing to the most expensive options. There are ways to cut expenses, even in the midst of the emotional turmoil. The first thing we can do is to have a trusted friend or relative help us with decisions, maybe even handle most of it. We need to become a little familiar with the Federal Trade Commission's regulations governing the funeral industry. This helps to know what is and isn't required. Learning what our state does and doesn't require is a good idea, too. A friend or relative can be a great help here as well as accompanying us to the funeral home to arrange the funeral.
Some states require a burial vault but some states don't. If one is required, the most expensive isn't really necessary. A lesser expensive one will work just as well. If one isn't required, don't buy one. It will be one less expense you just don't need. In choosing a casket, the less expensive ones really do look just as nice as the more elaborate ones. A simple wood casket looks just as good as a fancy brass casket and is a lot less expensive.
Having a big wreath might seem impressive, but consider that a nice arrangement of the deceased's favorite flowers will be more meaningful, as well as reduce expenses. That convoy of limos is entirely unnecessary, too. One limo for immediate family is enough and even that can be dispensed with if a friend or relative has a nice car that is large enough. It could actually be more comforting to have someone we know and trust to do the driving.
Without the unneeded expenses to haunt us later, we can breathe a little easier and only have the grief and adjustments of living without our loved one to deal with.
Both Michelle Bery & Patricia Bennett are contributors for EditorialToday. The above articles have been edited for relevancy and timeliness. All write-ups, reviews, tips and guides published by EditorialToday.com and its partners or affiliates are for informational purposes only. They should not be used for any legal or any other type of advice. We do not endorse any author, contributor, writer or article posted by our team.
Michelle Bery has sinced written about articles on various topics from Asthma, Home Security and Abdominal. For easy to understand, in depth information about funeral planning visit our ezGuide 2 .. Michelle Bery's top article generates over 135000 views. to your Favourites.
Patricia Bennett has sinced written about articles on various topics from Parental Care, After Divorce and Family. Patricia Bennett publishes a wealth of information on this subject.See . Patricia Bennett's top article generates over 5400 views. to your Favourites.
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