All that cheer! All that hype about families! All those good wishes and happy smiling folks in television ads thrilled at getting gifts of a diamond pendant, or new razor, or even a new car. And then there is you. Maybe you are alone and sad, missing a loved one who should be there to share in the happy holidays with you. It's depressing.



Holiday cheerfulness, happy Christmas wishes, New Years saludos are pumped up by merchants who want to increase their bottom line. To seduce you into thinking you can buy happiness. Giving a gift to a special loved one does make you feel better, but that good feeling is fleeting and soon gone. Giving of yourself lets you rise above your depression and lasts longer than unwrapping a gift.

If you are depressed or disappointed by all that Holiday cheer here are ten things you can do to feel better. Give of yourself?Give from your heart.

1. Invite someone to Christmas dinner who you know will be alone. You may want to ask them to bring something to share so they will feel that they have contributed.

2. Go to a religious service. Believer or non-believer it is uplifting to share good words, songs with a group of other people. Singing is uplifting for your spirit and your body.

3. Stay focused on the real meaning of Christmas. Giving to others 'like the Three Kings did. Find ways to give of yourself and to yourself?not just material things.

4. Help serve a meal at center giving free meals to the homeless.

5. Talk to neighbors and friends and collect usable warm clothes and blankets that can be used by the homeless. Take them to a donation and distribution center.

6. Adopt a family. Call the Salvation Army and get the name of a poor family including the names, sex and ages of the adults and children. Rally friends and family to collect money for food and gifts. Have a get together, wrap the gifts, buy the food and a few days before Christmas or on Christmas Eve take everything over to the family.

7. Go to a nursing home. Take gifts--even a candy cane will be appreciated. Organize or join a group and sing carols-- ask the residents to sing along.

8. If you have lost a loved one and miss him or her go to the cemetery and spend some time talking to them. Take a special gift. Your loved one may not be with you now but they still live on your heart. This applies to beloved pets too.

9. Go away. If being at home is too painful with memories of missing a loved one go away, go on a cruise, a short or long trip. Change your location-- be with new people. Create new rituals?next year will be easier.

10. Visit relative you enjoy being with. Share in their Holiday plans.

You will feel better if you give of yourself. Give your love without conditions or judgments. What goes around comes around.