I have faced the same affliction for many years, an affliction that I have prayed at length for God to remove. And yet the problem persists, even though I have prayed and cried. I told God for many years that He should make my circumstances better and make Me a better person. Despite my pleas I continually found myself in the same predicament. The fact that this did not work upset me to the core and led me to believe that God didn't love me.



Wanting desperately to discover why God had turned away from me, my heavy heart and anxious mind led me to begin reading my Bible once again. But what I anticipated was not at all what I actually found.

The Apostle Paul, a mighty man of God, had a prosperous ministry. He was a respected leader in the early Church. However, he had a difficult life. He endured many hardships including being shipwrecked, lost at sea, beaten with rods, on five occasions lashed to near death, imprisoned, nearly killed by riot, snake-bitten, stoned until believed to be dead, and eventually slain by the Romans. Paul was also known to have an affliction he referred to as a "thorn in the flesh," which, no matter how often he prayed, would never disappear (2 Corinthians 12:7-8). However, he went ahead, since he knew that the prize at the end would be worth all the hardships.

The Apostle John was a very fortunate man and was probably the closest student and companion that Jesus had. He observed all miracles and mysteries, never rejected Christ, continued to be faithful while other were faithless, was there for Jesus? hearings, was given responsibility of Jesus? mother, witnessed Jesus? death AND resurrection, was placed in leadership in the church, witnessed all that was spoken of in the book of Revelation, and died of natural causes. While he did all of these things, he was also persecuted by the Jews, kept in hiding as an apostle, boiled alive in oil, and ultimately banished to an island to die. As you can see, his life had its hardships as well.

God raised Daniel to a lofty position. He loved God and did not worship any idols. He was placed in the care of a steward who permitted him to be a vegetarian, was promoted for his faithfulness and his dream interpretations, was advanced above all of the King's magicians, survived in the lion's den, witnessed the telling of the future from the mouth of Gabriel himself, and passed away an old man. Nevertheless, he was also separated from his home and witnessed many of his people die. His closest friends were thrown into a fiery furnace; as for him, he was thrown into the den of lions because he prayed to God. His whole life was lived as a slave, dismissed by each new ruler until such a time arose when he was able to prove himself once again. Later, he died in a foreign land still living as a slave.

There are many men and women in Scripture who loved the Lord and remained faithful to Him, even though they were afflicted in ways that are difficult to even imagine. ?Of whom the world was not worthy? (Hebrews 11:38). I can think of Job, Ruth, David, Lazarus, Moses, Peter, all of the prophets, and many more men and women. God used each of them for His glory and, in doing so, proved that, even though life can be hard and the world is harsh, He will always watch over us.

The thing that really affected me is that God didn't cease to love these people and never left them alone. But He also never told them that their lives would be simple. To quote John 16:33, "In the world you will have trouble. But take heart; I have overcome the world." So how come I'm upset over just one affliction? Men and women with problems and afflictions fill the pages of the Bible. All through this, God remains true. Life is not easy, nor will all our troubles magically disappear but, no matter what happens, He promises to be with us. My issue does not seem so big compared to what other people have experienced.

Therefore, maybe I can use my affliction for the glory of God in the same way Paul did. Maybe knowing that I am imperfect will prove to other people that God can work with their weaknesses also. We have to remember that God has said in 2 Corinthians 12:9, ?My power is made perfect in weakness.? So I will accept my weakness the best I can, since God has a plan. For my support, I'll use God's words to his disciple Paul: "My grace is sufficient for you." Maybe this way other people can look at me the way that God does: as a person with an affliction who can still fulfill God's plan for her life.